California by any chance?

Hi Steve! Congrats on changing relationship with food. I just dropped caffeinated coffee cold turkey. My BP was high and my heart was racing for no reason. I’ll text you in church sometime.

Wow! Thanks for answering, both written and audio answers! It’ll take me a while to read and listen and respond, but I will.

It's a gorgeous poem, one that I thought of a lot recently after surgery.

Going gently makes a lot of sense to me now.

Raging - not so much.

Perhaps I'll change my mind next week.

Came to say the same thing. Happy New Year Hubski.

Agreed. The Israeli ambassador to France just quit. Could not in good conscience accept policies if this government.

Insane fun is a fabulous foundation. Grow. Deepen. Accept. Encourage.

I agree essentially with kb. If you’re vulnerable, you mght say, “come back after you’ve done your exploring.” That’s respectful, loving, and self-protecting.

Or just continue deepening the fun and closeness and base the “relationship” on the shared experiences of feeling heard, understood, and enjoyed. Live the relationship in real time.

I suspect that you putting contingencies on her exploring (like the ones you mentioned above) would feel controlling to her. It would be like YOU telling HER the parameters of her self-exploration.

Totally and genuinely accept her current presenting self as her best understanding of herself now. Find fun and personal growth in the situation as it is.

Have a great dinner tonight!!

bfx, the important thing is to have fun now, to deepen your relationship now, and continue being honest and open about fears and feelings. “Now” is all that’s real.

I went through three long relationships and two (too) long marriages before I stumbled across my current partner and and for the first time didn’t want to be with anyone else.

I was sixty-fucking-three when I got it, that monogamy is just wanting to have the best time with someone you like — not externally imposed.

Prior to now in my life, monogamy was just another word for controlling. If monogamy is not based on the desire and joy in being together, then it’s control. Good for her that she’s exploring her feelings about sex and sexuality. She may want to do more exploring than you feel comfortable with - if that’s the case, figure out the roots of your discomfort- which is probably insecurity, which leads to control.

Still, time with others is time not with you.

Having a “relationship” or an imagined “future” with someone does not replace the necessity of also having to have a life.

Hi bfx

I know Lillooet. I used to live in Mount Currie Back then, the only way to Lillooet was on a hydro road. Lots of sad history. Canmore is also beautiful.

Happy hiking.

I guess that's true. I met you once in person, but I "attended" the birth of #2.

I miss you. I miss "talking" to you and steve. But to get to know you better -- what does that even mean? We're always changing anyway.

Anyway, those "great" days, were dark days when staying up listening to great radio and responding to hubski was WAY MORE INTERESTING than going to bed with my then husband.

I will visit Hubski more. I have questions!!

xxxoo

yeessss -- and some of us know some of those reasons!

I assume you mean the mean the metaphorical hubski-lit blaze. But if you mean a realy fire, what state are you in. I mean US state, not state of mind (or state of dress or undress).

I will keep it burning. It's burning now. There's much to say. I'll be back.

Is it bitterly cold and snow-blasted??

It depends very much on where you are -- although potentially everywhere can be bitterly cold and snow-blasted. Vancouver is milder.

omg!! You will have warm weather. How wonderful! And tennis. Sigh. it's cold here, but I spent a lot of time outside, getting the last of the ceramic flower pots indoors and getting the wet wood-rotting leaves off the wooden deck. And crushing aluminum. I'll have to write a post about aluminum soon.

My brother said he identifies with all his characters, even the villains. He says that he has to fully get inside his characters to understand their motives.

I also asked him if he had a philosophy of comedy. He did. Comedy is creating a situation in which the underdog embarrasses the top dog.

Of course, it's a lot more than that, but that's always at the back of his mind. A specific event in his childhood made him realize the power of language to affect and offend the oppressor, and create language, and thenewgreen if you ask, I'll tell you that story.

ONWARD.

Also not getting notifications for shout outs like this mk

It sounds fabulous. I could so use some 24 degrees C right now. I'm in Canada.

1) are you a student, just finished for the year? If yes, a student of what?

2) How did you become acquainted with hubski?

great images -- the asphalt waving!

. . .through the maze

Where are you?

Walking through the neighborhood where I grew up, where the house that was my mother’s is:

I passed “Stevenson’s.” This is kind of an antique store full of oddments.

I asked Mike Stevenson to look at my mother’s stuff after she died in June 2021. He took some furniture and a bunch of odd things, games, costume jewelry. He gave me $100 for the odd things.

Walking by just now I saw my mother’s Scrabble game. Or was it my mother’s?

I regretted giving it to him. It had wooden tiles - I was told they don’t make wooden Scrabble tiles anymore (Is that true?). Also I’ve lost several tiles in my set and replaced them with cardboard.

I went in.

I said, “Can I buy back my mother’s Scrabble game?”

“ Just take it,” said Stephenson’s wife as she called Mike over.

“just take it,” said Mike.

Love to hear what you come up with.

Just read that fantastic writing prompt!

What a time we had.

New and different times now.