How might I?
High school was probably a breeze for some of you, or a complete struggle, all of course for varying reasons. As I enter my second year soon, I'm extremely anxious and would love some insight.
(Also, if there's any interest in the question, I'll expound a bit on my failures of the past year.)
Hold deep and strong in the very deepest wells of your soul the incontrovertible fact that none of these people will matter the slightest to you, have any impact on your future, hold any sway over your fortune, or any input into your destiny. Recognize that high school is a killing field of trimming neurons, overflowing hormones, untrained judgement and uninformed decisions colliding with each other and maximizing bloodshed. Also recognize that the amount of bloodshed and collision is far, far, far less than it seems. Understand that any decision or choice that does not risk addiction, incarceration, serious injury or death is a decision to be taken in the affirmative. You will regret the chances not taken far more than the risks that did not go your way. Internalize that everyone around you is just as frustrated, just as afraid, just as awkward, just as acned, just as insecure, just as sad, just as angry and just as despairing as you. Also internalize that no one is allowed to say this. The twilight region between childhood and adulthood is a dark place where vision is scarce. Its denizens rely on smell: they can smell fear. They can smell fakery. They can smell a rat. Be true to yourself, be true to others, be true not only to you but to your idealized version of you. Appreciate that in the land of the blind the one-eyed man is king and a modicum of self-esteem and motivation shall make you a leader. Know that smiles are contagious and that simply paying attention to someone can make you a friend for life. If you pretend you're happy you will eventually fool even yourself. If you put others' concerns ahead of your own they will follow your example. Appreciate that the Internet is homogenous but the people around you are unique. Focus on those you can physically touch, not those who type long, obnoxious platitudes aimed vaguely in your direction. Talk is cheap. Touch is priceless. Watch John Hughes films. All of them. Not all of them are great but nearly all of them are good. The archetypes change, but the song remains the same: adolescence is a trying time for everyone and has been since the invention of the teenager. You will survive it. You will look back. And you will assign an undue importance to everything that happens within the next two years for the rest of your life - that's just the hormones talking. In order to leave the trap of your own creation before you're forced to live in it, remember that 'high school' is a pejorative prefix for the rest of the world for a reason. It all seems more important than it actually is, and unless you take steps now to nip that shit in the bud, it always will be. Good luck. Stay strong, play hard, use protection and steer clear of anything intravenous or deriving from red phosphorus. You'll be fine.
This reminded me so much of a piece that was popular on Dr. Demento when I was a pup - the "Deteriorata", pasted below (which actually became a lot funnier for me, when I heard what it was a parody of, "Desiderata"). Go placidly amid the noise and waste
And remember what comfort there may be in owning a piece thereof
Avoid quiet and passive persons, unless you are in need of sleep
Rotate your tires Speak glowingly of those greater than yourself
And heed well their advice, even though they be turkeys
Know what to kiss, and when Consider that two wrongs never make a right, but that three do
Wherever possible, put people on hold
Be comforted that in the face of all aridity and disillusionment
And despite the changing fortunes of time
There is always a big future in computer maintenance You are a fluke of the universe
You have no right to be here
And whether you can hear it or not
The universe is laughing behind your back Remember The Pueblo
Strive at all times to bend, fold, spindle, and mutilate
Know yourself
If you need help, call the FBI
Exercise caution in your daily affairs
Especially with those persons closest to you -
That lemon on your left, for instance Be assured that a walk through the ocean of most souls
Would scarcely get your feet wet
Fall not in love therefore. It will stick to your face
Gracefully surrender the things of youth: birds, clean air, tuna, Taiwan
And let not the sands of time get in your lunch Hire people with hooks
For a good time, call 606-4311. Ask for Ken
Take heart in the bedeepening gloom
That your dog is finally getting enough cheese
And reflect that whatever fortune may be your lot
It could only be worse in Milwaukee You are a fluke of the universe
You have no right to be here
And whether you can hear it or not
The universe is laughing behind your back Therefore, make peace with your god
Whatever you perceive him to be - hairy thunderer, or cosmic muffin
With all its hopes, dreams, promises, and urban renewal
The world continues to deteriorate
Give up! You are a fluke of the universe
You have no right to be here
And whether you can hear it or not
The universe is laughing behind your back
That said, you are 100% correct in everything you write here. It's really good advice. Great advice though KB.Hold deep and strong in the very deepest wells of your soul the incontrovertible fact that none of these people will matter the slightest to you, have any impact on your future, hold any sway over your fortune, or any input into your destiny.
-Unless you let them. I've noticed that in the FB culture that we are in, many people still allow their feelings from HS, the hierarchy that dominated daily life to continue on in to adulthood. Its crazy, but it happens. It all seems more important than it actually is
-Man, this is so spot on. You think you're the most anything when you are in HS. I'm the most in love, sad, happy, talented, all-knowing, spiritual, in touch, inquisitive, talented that I'll EVER be. Nope -- the good things can get even better and the bad things can diminish, given time.
Well, it seems that I had a much different experience with high school than the rest of the commenters and I will provide my take on high school because it is always good to see the whole spectrum. I was much more of a "jock" stereotype, but I was also in all AP/Honors classes so people thought of me differently. I have a very fluid personality and would move between groups depending on my setting. I wasn't faking anything, I just could relate to all different people and there is no point in isolating yourself just because of what is "cool". I brought together the true jocks who were terrible at school and the honors kids who weren't into sports. Our lunch table was one big social Venn diagram. I honestly had a really good experience in high school which I know is not the same for everyone. I always tried to boost the morale of some people who really didn't like the social dynamics of high school. I had a very close relationship with one of my teachers who became a dean and had me as a student aide. Me and him had a group of fellow students and teachers who tried to limit any bullying and bring people into his office to hang out and escape for awhile during bad days. I've seen the quietest kids blow up and freak out because they are constantly disrespected by assholes. It will sound super cliche, but just be yourself. There is no point in trying to make friends based off of a false personality. Join a variety of different clubs so you can meet more people and get engaged. I played soccer and baseball all throughout high school and it definitely helps for confidence and making friendships. Good luck with the sophomore year.
Simple really, be yourself. Some people are bound to be rude and hateful, but the majority isn't. Just focus on enjoying yourself and doing what you want to do. Definitely take any extra curricular opportunities that you can, if they interest you that is. Don't force yourself to do something you won't enjoy. But I really wish I had been more involved in highschool. That's where you'll meet new people and have the most fun.
I went to a very ghetto high school with lots of fights, drugs, guns, and gang violence. Surviving for me was keeping my head down, getting jumped by 5+ people on more than a few occasions, being the only white kid on my bus, and learning to handle myself in a fight, and be wise enough to avoid those situations at all costs. Surviving high school for me was a lot different than most peoples version of "surviving" high school where their biggest problem was some emo shit like "I only have two friends and the girl I like doesn't like me back". So, just realize whatever you fears and problems are, lots of people out there have it much worse. Basically, your problems are probably insignificant, and none of the people that matter now will matter 5 or 10 years from now. High school isn't important, it's not the best days of your life, and it's not something you'll really give a shit 10 years from now. Just enjoy it, make friends, have girlfriends, stay out too late, experiment, and enjoy being young and not having a ton of responsibility. Life gets better as you get older (in my experience), but it also gets a little harder with each passing year. Just relax and enjoy it. It's only high school. High school is only important to people in it.