I think I am having one of the worst weeks ever. What according to you is the worst feeling ever?
Hopelash. Hopelash is emotional whiplash. It's that feeling that happens when you've been expecting something and excited for it, looking forward to it, really amped up about it, and then...shit falls through and all your good feelings melt into crumbling upset and disappointment. Possibly tears. I hate hopelash more than anything.
Yeah so our lease is up in the air. Been working with this building since January. We've had three architects come by, drawn up two floorplans, given them two Letters of Intent, they have a 3-year P&L, a 5-year projection and a letter of credit from Wells Fargo. The last interaction we had with them was "Yeah, we'll do a 5-year lease if you pay for 50% of the TI." They came back with "Yeah, we'll pay for 100% of the TI if you do a 10-year lease." So then we brought in two architects (the first one, recommended by my sister the architect, was a farce) to come up with a real TI number. That real TI number came in within 5% of the previous estimate. So we gave them another letter of intent of "Yeah, we'll do a 10-year lease if you pay 100% of the TI, also we want to be able to buy out the lease after 5 years by repaying you 50% of the TI." They came back with "yeah, this isn't going to work out." Except it's bullshit because when we first started talking to the place their realtor was all "better hurry! We just accepted an LOI from someone else!" despite the fact that the place has been unrented since 2009. And now here we are, within the error bars of their previous terms, and they're all "fuck off and die." Which leads me to believe that their real estate broker is just an OMEGACHOAD but nonetheless. - 2 floor plans - 1 11-page narrative - 4 fucking conference calls - 2 site visits (which involve an airplane) - "Yeah, this isn't going to work out." We're going to give them a while to change their bullshit story, to quote The Fugitive, but yeah. Total hopelash.
We're not entirely sure it isn't working. The problem is, to do this stuff you've got a broker on our side and a broker on their side and you have to play like a 3-step game of telephone to do anything. We'll have a better idea of how badly it isn't working when we hear back from the other two steps.
Yes. Yes yes yes. I love that term and am going to start using it. How do you combat hopelash?
Exactly this ButterflyEffect - hope for the best, but prepare for the worst. I also try not to believe that what i want to happen is going to happen, especially if the odds aren't in my favor. For instance recently I applied to grad school, and I knew it was much more realistic to believe I wouldn't get in. I would so much rather be ecstatically surprised because I got something I wanted, than blase because i got something I felt I "deserved." So, uh...expect for things not to work out the way you want. Sounds a little negative but honestly, it is pretty important to practice realistic expectations, or else you end up that crazy Bridezilla where everything is planned planned planned and perfect perfect perfect and the day will never live up to your expectations, ever, anyway, at all, because they're just so completely sky-high. (Bridezilla was the first good example i can think of, but basically, anyone can do this about any event. Birthdays too probably. These people end up usually awfully disappointed, a result which is inevitable because they started with expectations that could never be met.) Don't be like that. Be like the opposite of that, about whatever you're excited about.
Hopelash is the best word ever. Also same. Hopelash sucks.
I will start using this term more often, I like it.
It actually describes the feeling which the majority of the population might be facing at a point of time. This also can be in terms of running after something a lot, putting in all the effort possible but in the end not getting it. I think this is the worst feeling ever for me.
My worst feeling is dissapointing someone, or when I work on something a long time and lose progress. Doubly whammy last week when I did my second, most officially official podcast episode with my sister. We recorded the whole thing, I felt like it was a really strong episode, then on playback Audacity wasn't getting our audio fast enough so there was clipping for 20 minutes of the 35 minute episode. Completely unusable. AND I was worried my sister would be disappointed. Straight up almost got teary that night. Luckily she didn't seem that affected by it. I think I'm more invested in it than she is, haha... Feel better!
I hope things get better JT. The worse feeling ever is no feeling... numbness, being so beat up that you refuse to feel. - although this week you might disagree. I guess that's why drugs and alcohol are so popular - to create the numbness that sits behind the euphoria. and as usual, I'm probably wrong. Maybe hopelessness is worse than numbness.