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comment by steve
steve  ·  816 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: It's the International Trans Day of Visibility. I'm Trans. Ask Me Almost Anything

I've never heard the term QUILTBAG community before... I feel like it's something I would call my mom (she's an avid sewer and quilter).

What does that mean? And don't quit there, you mentioned lingo. Cultural lingo fascinates me. What else have you got?

coffeesp00ns  ·  816 days ago  ·  link  ·  

QUILTBAG is like LGBT, or LGBTQ, or LGBTQ, or LGBTQIAA, etc. It's just an acronym to describe the community of people. I use it mostly because it's funny, but also because it's more inclusive then LGBTQ+. Really, if i'm being serious the one I like the best is GSM, which stands for Gender and Sexual minorities.

I think QUILTBAG is generally accepted as being Queer, Undecided, Intersex, Lesbian, Trans, Bisexual, Asexual, and Gay, but honestly the letters all get reassigned all the time because sometimes the GSM community just likes making its own life more complicated.

As for lingo, man, there's so much. Some of it is serious, and some of it is the community having a laugh at itself while describing common life experience

Passing is a very common one. It basically means presenting as the gender you wish to be seen as and raising no eyebrows, or not being what one could describe as "visibly" outside of the gender binary.

If you can do this - because not everyone can, or wants to - it is said that you have "passing privilege". Some people desire this because it is safe, or safer to be a trans person if you can pass as cisgender.

Cisgender just means that your gender and the gender the doctor assigned you at birth are the same. I'd say that your Gender and Sex are the same, but the truth is that unless you've actually had it tested, you probably don't know what your chromosomes actually are, and they might be different from what you think they are.

A "Beard" is a term that describes an opposite-sex partner for a same-sex attracted person, usually for the purpose of deceiving unaccepting relatives, but occasionally sometimes when they're lying to themselves, too. In some cases the Beard is complicit (it's usually much better this way), but in other cases the Beard is being strung along and it's a gross situation.

I can add more if people want, and other people who are hanging out and are part of the GSM community can add some too.

katakowsj  ·  816 days ago  ·  link  ·  

What's the origin of the word cisgender? I've never heard it before. Is it likely I don't know it because I've never known, at least, clearly known, anyone that is trans?

coffeesp00ns  ·  816 days ago  ·  link  ·  

It's Latin. It's just the opposite of Trans. An example would be Cisalpine Gaul - The section of Gaul on the same side of the Alps as the Romans.

katakowsj  ·  816 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Wow. Likely not a new term then, huh? Cool. Thanks for the info.

Devac  ·  816 days ago  ·  link  ·  

It's also a type of isomerism in chemistry. Depending on at what side of carbon chain is the functional group, it's either cis or trans. Some chemicals, like rhodopsin on your own retinal rods, change their isomerism when stimulated by light. It gets twisted in a way and as it changes from cis to all-trans it causes the molecule to squeeze due to photons and as it relaxes back it causes the further action that is crucial for sight.

coffeesp00ns  ·  816 days ago  ·  link  ·  

well, i think aplying cis- to -gender is newish, but really it's just the correct grammatical way to deal with it if we are going to call people who don't identify with their assigned gender "trans".

steve  ·  816 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Because you had capitalized the letters, I wondered if it was a rearranged, enhanced, but tongue in cheek rendition of LGBTQ. Thanks for the insight. I'll think more on other questions.

mike  ·  815 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Wow - I didn't know chromosomally gender could appear on a spectrum. How many chromosomes can determine gender and how many gradiants are there on a genetic scale? It totally makes sense having heard that, and you get a feel with some people that their gender is a mismatch, and that feeling goes on a scale too.

I'm thinking particularly of a woman I worked with we are pretty sure she had misplaced gender. She is pretty as a woman, but has some masculine features and moves like a man. It's strange and hard to explain, but with some people you just know, do you know what I mean? Well, this woman was from a very religious family and wouldn't dream of exploring anything outside set expectations. She has a serious boyfriend now, and I feel a little sorry for her, but at the same time what do I know?

coffeesp00ns  ·  815 days ago  ·  link  ·  

well, we have to be careful here with terminology.

Gender has nothing to do with Chromosomes - Sex does. Gender's in your brain, mostly. I think you're

referring to when I said this:

    I'd say that your Gender and Sex are the same, but the truth is that unless you've actually had it tested, you probably don't know what your chromosomes actually are, and they might be different from what you think they are.

When I said this I meant more specifically that there are many chromosomal disorders that are more common than people realize, and that some people who have them may not even know because they don't make you very different - XYY for example is one of the more common ones, and is found in around 1:1000 male births (and most people who do have it don't even know). XXY, or Kleinfelter's, is even more common, being pegged between 1:500 and 1:1000 male births.

So, Sex exists in a wide variety of forms outside of XX and XY. To further complicate things, there are also some disorders like Androgen Insensitivity Syndrome, which affect how testosterone is absorbed by the body. With Complete AIS, One can be a biologically XY person that presents and grows and goes through puberty exactly as someone with XX chromosomes usually would, including having a womb and being able to carry children. I've even read a paper of one XY woman giving birth to an XY daughter (I'm not sure if AIS is hereditary).

thenewgreen  ·  795 days ago  ·  link  ·  

My grandmother belongs to a group called the "Happy Hookers." She assures us that I t's a rug-hooking group.