Sometimes you have to choose between being a dick or being roadkill. My kid? I gotta lean against the door to keep her from getting out when she throws a tantrum like that. It opens in, which means I'm right up in there with her, which means she tugs on my leg and stuff... but it's all about boundaries. She's mad, she's not getting her way, but she's safe and she's learning that daddy's in charge. Makes me feel like shit, too. I still do it.
Had you beat the kid up a week ago he wouldn't have come back. Or, he would have come back with a gun. All you can do is use your best judgement and hope you guessed right each time. If you didn't second-guess yourself you'd be incapable of learning.
If you had to choose between "the end of on-street parking" or "the end of shootings" which would you choose? 'cuz the grocery store is gonna clean up the neighborhood. Their investment far outranks yours. That's one thing about gentrification - it's hell on crime.
Grace under pressure is a great attribute to have. For some of us, it's more of a goal. Take care of you.