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swedishbadgergirl's profile

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following: 77
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hubskier for: 2356 days

Swedish person who definitely does not do IB. Likes writing, music, computers, politics and many other things. Blogs never.

Swedishbadgergirl@gmail.com if I'm hiding somewhere.

recent comments, posts, and shares:
swedishbadgergirl  ·  25 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Pubski: November 4, 2020

Hello! I've tried very hard to not think about the election and pretty much made it until election day. There's a local lockdown where I live, the city has closed down "everything we can legally close" which honestly isn't very much - they only have a mandate to close the things they run, tenants in the cities buildings can't be forced to close for example. But it sends a message. So no climbing, or swimming, or in person meet-ups for me. The restrictions are in force until November 19th, but might be extended.

I try not to think about that either, I wrote a list of things to do at home, and try to think that every moment no matter how poorly spent is a moment closer to loosening of restrictions, and that every day spent at home is slowing the spread of the virus.

swedishbadgergirl  ·  41 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Ikea to buy back used furniture in recycling push

    If the furniture is not assembled, you will be provided with the tools to enable you to assemble the furniture at the store.

I don't know why but this is quite funny to me.

swedishbadgergirl  ·  42 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: So hubski, how are things going?

That really, really sucks. Depression is the worst. I hope things turn around for you.

swedishbadgergirl  ·  43 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: So hubski, how are things going?

Shit IS weird. Hopefully you get back to your usual social competence when shit unweirds.

swedishbadgergirl  ·  43 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: So hubski, how are things going?

Good thing there isn't any obvious brain damage, but still sounds like a rough situation. Hopefully those followups lead to something good.

swedishbadgergirl  ·  43 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: So hubski, how are things going?

What I think is my main problem is that I've gotten in to the really bad habit of sometimes switching off and not trying when me and my lab-partner get stuck on a problem. I want to believe this is due to it being harder to focus when everything is distanced and not the fact that I have no one to be held accountable to. (Aka, my lab partner can't see me so doesn't notice I've drifted of). Which one is it? Who knows. The solution is oh so very simple in theory (just pay attention) but in practice things have worked out differently.

I don't have the same problem working on individual stuff - there is no-one else to solve those problems after all. I've never been the slacker of a group project before and I am not liking the rising suspicion that I might be right now. I'm probably more concerned with "being a bad person" than with "not being productive".

Good to hear that things aren't bad. I've found it hard to say that things are "good" even when things are pretty good on a personal level since I can't really shake how things could have been if things were normal.

swedishbadgergirl  ·  44 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Pubski: October 14, 2020

Next year I'm getting a membership and "wall-card" and I'm probably getting my own shoes sometime before then. Then I'll be able to go there as much as I want at no extra cost since I've paid everything up front. Hopefully I'll continue to find it fun, I've only been 6 or 7 times so far.

swedishbadgergirl  ·  44 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Pubski: October 14, 2020

I did a problem I've found super tricky today! I am never climbing it again because it was terrible and kinda scary but I did it! Now I have one problem left of that difficulty. (The second easiest one). I'm looking forward to being able to tackle some of the problems I see others attempting (although I'm guessing some of them will require a pretty significant increase in upper body strength).

swedishbadgergirl  ·  45 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Mythical creature of europe

Hmm, have they included Näcken ?

swedishbadgergirl  ·  46 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Pubski: October 14, 2020

Hello! I have found a new hobby - I discovered there is a climbing gym like 3 minutes from my apartment and was like "hey, climbing sounds fun!". I went to a night where they let you try climbing and discovered that climbing on a wall is not fun but bouldering is great. Which is convenient since I can boulder by myself. I've gone five times and I am loving it so far. I ruined my hands last friday, maybe because of a lack of chalk, maybe due to callouses having built up and getting caught and torn off, maybe a mixture of both. I've ordered chalk online that arrived today and I'm hoping my hands will be healed enough for me to do a bit of climbing on Friday.

It's really fun being a complete beginner at something and seeing improvements from session to session, I think I'm hitting that first plateau of improvements stalling and I'm really hoping I'll still find it fun. I think I will though. I'm also really proud of myself for going in to the climbing gym and participating even though I don't know anyone or anything. I'm easily the worst climber there, and I'm not a hundred percent on the social "rules" but I dared to go in there and participate anyways.

In Sweden admission to most majors is jdone on pure numbers. You have several categories, grades, grades if you've added courses after graduation, högskoleprovet (kind of like the SAT i think) and then some others. Everyone is ranked and if you're ranked higher than there are places you're in. You also have specific courses you must have read to be qualified to the course.

The idea of having to send in an essay, having to have done extra-curriculars, having to show your love for the school you're applying to well enough and then maybe being rejected because of something completely out of your control is so stressful. I get that there might be benefits to having those extra selection criteria but for the individual student it just seems like an enormous amount of anxiety. And an enormous amount of work for the schools.

swedishbadgergirl  ·  85 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Pubski: September 2, 2020

First week of school is not treating me well. I had the fortune of not having any lectures the half term before summer, just project-work, lecture manuscripts to read through and zoom mentoring sessions. Nothing that entailed sitting in front of a screen for 2 (or 4) hours at a time, having to memorize and retain as much information as normal but without having the benefit of a classroom setting or a lecturer who is able to read the room, and with all the distractions of being in your own home.

I really didn't think I would find distance-mode that awful. Yeah, it would suck getting zero human contact most days, and losing contact with my class but when it comes to the actual learning I didn't think I would find it all that hard. After all, spring term went fine and I did over half of high-school from my home.


As I've now learned there is a difference between content designed to be taught from a distance, and content having to be taught from a distance despite not being designed for that. (And also this material is harder to grasp than for example high-school natural science.) So most lecture so far have been a vicious cycle of the following.

1. I try and pay attention.

2. I don't feel like I am following or understanding the material.

3. I look at twitter, or reddit, or cookieclicker to distract myself from the anxiety of not understanding/the boredom of listening to something I don't understand.

4. I feel guilty for not trying hard enough.

And then that over and over for 2 hours. I realize that I need to break this cycle, and the best way to do so is to try and just... Be okay with not getting it, and hoping that something will click in place once I have to use the knowledge I have gained practically. And then just pay attention and not fall into the trap of "well I'm not getting this so I might as well just look at my phone". Because then even if I don't get the subject I'm not feeling like shit over not paying attention properly.

I'll try and knit or something on Monday, because then my hands will be occupied with very little brainpower used and it will hopefully be calming and distracting enough that I don't just sit and think about how I am fucked because I don't understand.

And like, I am academically competent. I am in general confident in that I will pass my classes (eventually) if I put the work in. I have read the prerequisites for my classes, I am not in a bad position when it comes to getting the material. But it does feel like nothing is entering my brain at all.

I try and tell myself it's just been a week. We've had very little practical work and assignments were we apply our knowledge. I'm not even behind, even though it feels like I am. I'm just hoping that everything will feel like it clicks eventually, hopefully real soon.

I just hope Amazon fails.