Trying to make a decision, if y'all had any advice I'd appreciate it My friend/old roommate who just got a Google job is moving to Austin next week and offered to split a 2/2 if I joined him there. Got super mixed feelings about it. Have to decide, like, immediately. Context is: living with my parents in boring Florida suburbs for $0/mo rent. Working remote. There's still like 2 people I know from high school still around. Really not happy with my life but in ways that are hard (for me at least) to pin to any specific thing that should be different. Pros: - Austin is a cool place that has things to do - Friend is a cool guy - Maybe a change of scenery will happen to help Cons: - Expensive. Goes from saving ~90% of my paycheck to maybe 20%. Don't have any particular thing to be saving towards tho. House maybe? idk -_- - Feels pointless to move from a Red state to another Red state. - Feels pointless to move anywhere in America - Not excited about the cool stuff in Austin but that will hopefully change once there - Need a new job, which may or may not be Remote or in Austin - If I was to open a Boardgame Cafe it probably wouldn't be in Austin So that's basically it. Do I upset my life at the drop of a hat now that there's a reason to be in Austin? Gotta figure this one out ASAP Other life updates: Have the weirdest feelings about my friend's Google job. On one hand, I'm very happy for him, he clearly deserves it and this has been his dream job. On the other hand, I hate Google passionately and kinda always have. Hell, I was as that annoying guy shilling for Firefox back in high school and also in college and also right now (you gotta use Firefox!!). My other roommate just started at Amazon, another company I deeply hate. And I'm happy for them and wow they pay well and objectively what they're doing probably isn't any worse for the world than I'm doing. And logically, I probably should be working there too. But so much of my identity is tied up in hating those companies that seeing two of by besties being excited to work there is just gut wrenching. & a sincere thank you to everyone who offered advice last week! Been having a blast with QGIS fiddling with everything. The simple fact that OpenStreetMaps exists is inspiring. So far got points for every Makerspace MakeCo knows about, every existing boardgame cafe, and a random pile of Census data. Tons to do here and being able to just pan and zoom and fiddle with colors is incredibly cute. Got the trial for LivePlan and have been having fun fiddling with that too. Then read a bunch of articles about how most coffee shops are opened by amateurs who hate office life and 90% of them fail in the first year, which was less fun. <3
- if you love Austin you will forever thank your friend for bringing you there. - if you hate Austin you will forever condemn your friend for bringing you there. - I'm sure he'd love to have you with him again. - I'm also sure he's done the math on what half of a 2/2 costs compared to what all of a 1/1 costs and if you're going to have to deal with a roommate, better the devil you know. So look. My mother started a family tradition: when she was looking at colleges, she got out an atlas, got out a compass, and inscribed a thousand mile radius around her parents' house. She then blackballed all colleges within that radius. I, too did something similar: in 8th grade, I started auditioning "places I could build a future" because fuckin' hell I wasn't gonna be anywhere near the goddamn desert in general or New Mexico in particular. I'd like to highlight a sentiment that you should view as an opportunity: This does not sound like an assessment based on firsthand knowledge. It looks more like a prejudice borne of your personal circumstance and experience. You can fix that tho! You work remotely, yes? And you want to open a gaming cafe. You're looking at business plans, you're messing around in GIS, you're researching things like crazy and you're seriously contemplating tearing up roots for FUCKING AUSTIN (fuck Austin, by the way - Fuck It In The Neck) but it doesn't sound like you've done any actual market research. Go do some market research. Figure out your minimum living situation. Talking absolute minimum. Can you live out of the back of a Prius? Can you live out of the back of a Chevy Astro? Can you live out of the back of a conversion van? Or do you need to crash at an AirBnB every night? Whatever your comfort level is times your available funding will dictate the length of your exploration. Figure out everywhere that might be a cool place to build a future. Because trust me: if you do this right you'll never get to leave. You do not build a business with the intent of pullilng up roots five years down the line. I actually really like America, there are just groups of Americans that, when allowed to group together, do repulsive things. You can avoid most of them, particularly if you have a blank slate as far as where you hang your hat. Let work know that you're "getting some air" or "vision questing" or "seeing America" or whatever is going to hit them the kindest. You're young and they're not and they will root you on, mutherfucker particularly if you still get your work done and make meetings. Enroll your parents, enroll your friends, enroll random strangers on obscure online message boards, ask elizabeth for tips because she did something similar not too long ago. Now - build out a map/road trip of "places I think might be great to live/open a gaming cafe" combined with "gaming cafes that seem to kick ass whose brains I want to pick." See if you know anyone or know anyone who knows anyone in those places. Next, pick up the phone and call those gaming cafes. Let them know you're coming, let them know if they'd let you hang out for a day, let them know if they'd let you take them to lunch, let them know you definitely aren't opening up next to them but their operation looks cool and you're trying to figure out what your own gaming cafe would look like and where you would put it. This is your support network. Value them, trust them, but don't trust them blindly. Create some sort of channel where they can keep in touch with you - I don't care if it's an email list or a Substack, just somewhere they can see an occasional road picture. They're investing their attention in you, pay it back. You don't need to be an influencer, you don't need to be a vlogger, you just need to be "spencerflem, that cool guy sleeping out off a prius for six months so he could open a bitchin' gaming cafe in Chillicothe for some reason." You are at a unique turning point in your life, and you are singularly well-equipped to take advantage of it. If you can give over 30 days to figuring out where your future lies, that's 30 days more than most people spend. Imagine what you could do with 90 days! Imagine what you could do with six months! Buy your "minimum transport/living container", pay to get it looked over to ensure it'll make it 20k miles, get a phat roaming plan on your cell phone and venture forth. You'll learn stuff about yourself, you'll learn stuff about gaming cafes, you'll learn stuff about America (or fuck, Canada - swing for the fences) and whatever you do next? You won't be approaching it from a place of uncertainty. Three other thoughts: 1) Don't scrimp on the car because you're going to sell it when you're done. So also try not to abuse the crap out of it. 2) I asked the local if they were getting any grief from the Games Workshop down the street, as Games Workshop is notorious for being dix. They told me that in fact, GW throws business at them on the reg because there is stuff that GW is not allowed to carry because GW are dix yet people want. I can confirm that family friends moved to North Dakota to buy a Games Workshop franchise and they are, in fact, happy as pigs in shit. So you could do worse than feed these into your GIS, feed this into your business plan and feed this into your calculations. "Cool places that have a Games Workshop but no other gaming cafes" is probably a query you can run. 3) Any business opened as an alternative to a money-making enterprise people hate will go under. Clubs are the same - most people think it's about hanging out with your friends and being cool but it's actually about serving alcohol to assholes at inflated prices. That said, coffee shops are among the most bulletproof small businesses out there.- Feels pointless to move anywhere in America
Yeah, spent a summer bumming around the east coast taking pictures of rocks. My favorite city turned out to be Philly. Brooklyn is cool and all, but if I’d move to build a life anywhere in the east it would be Philly no contest. Was also pleasantly surprised by St-Louis. But your judgement of a city will always be tainted by who you hung out with when you were there first, and it’s a hard to undo first impression. I have totally biased views of cities all over the world - go make your own misjudgments based on 72h in a city and get into arguments with other travelers about it. Reach out to anyone you might tangentially know, Couchsurf, swing by my place if you’re near Montreal. I’ve never explored middle America or the north east. There seems to be some really dope spots out there! I have many friends that have been nomads for years, and I think there are definitely vibes to a city, and places that will fit your own vibe better than others. Everywhere has flaws, you just need to find a place with flaws you can live with. You have the friend and the opportunity, why not also just move to Austin for a 6 month stint. Moving is daunting - if you can do it once with the company of a friend, doing it again will be easier. Look at it as an exchange semester abroad. Get a job at a game shop to see how it runs from the inside.
And while you're doing it, make sure you're listening to this song.Figure out your minimum living situation. Talking absolute minimum. Can you live out of the back of a Prius? Can you live out of the back of a Chevy Astro? Can you live out of the back of a conversion van? Or do you need to crash at an AirBnB every night? Whatever your comfort level is times your available funding will dictate the length of your exploration.
I know I am late to the party, but there will never be a better thing for you to do at this point in your life, than to pull up stakes and move somewhere else on a whim. First off, you get out of your parents house. That has to happen for you to become an individual. Second off, you gotta deal with all the stuff around moving multiple states away. (Hint: Take nothing you can't fit in a backpack and suitcase. Literally nothing you own today is going to matter in the least, in your new place.) Third, if it turns out that Austin isn't your jam, you now have more information about what you DO like, and what is ACTUALLY important to you, so your next move is going to be even better. Fourth, if you DON'T go, you will always wonder if you'd missed out on anything amazing... it'll bug you at night for the rest of your life. While you will NEVER long for having stayed at home living in mom's basement. Fifth, you will meet awesome people in Austin, because they have also heard the stories about Austin, and were drawn there. Will you all stay there? Will it vibe with all of you? No. And that means they will relocate to other amazing places (NOLA, Stockholm, Portland, whatever) and you will be able to visit them and see places you might not have visited, if you didn't already know someone there. GO. DO THE THING. You are at the time in life when there are literally NO repercussions from experimenting and trying new shit out. Later on in life, you won't have these options, and you will forever regret not taking advantage of them to their fullest.
How did I miss that? PostGIS in QGIS is my bread ‘n butter. ArcGIS Online too, with a lot of flight hours in Pro and ArcPy. I can’t do everything but I sure have tricks up my sleeve, so hmu if you have questions. & a sincere thank you to everyone who offered advice last week! Been having a blast with QGIS fiddling with everything.
You headed to FOSS4G this year? Grabbed a beer today with a soon-to-be ex-coworker who’s introduced me to PostGIS last month (and reminded me FOSS4G is a thing). Can’t believe this opensource tech is so shunned in academia when it’s so powerful. Would like to poach him if possible in the event the last workplace would offer his target salary.
Having a job you like is more important than living somewhere cool (and personally, I've always found Austin to be highly overrated as far as America's cool cities go). I had a corporate job out of college that I loathed, and I took a giant pay cut to go to grad school and get into a field I love. Not being hyperbolic when I say that in 16 years I've never had the fuck-I-hate-Monday feeling. The best advice I can give to a younger person is to figure out what it is you like to do, and then figure out a way to make money doing that. Nothing better that you can do for your wellbeing. As to living with your parents or not...guess it depends on the relationship. I would rather be poverty stricken than live with my mom. Stomaching Hot-N-Readys for years on end is a small price to pay for peace of mind. I moved out on my 18th birthday, and we've had a good relationship ever since, after hating each other for years. There are a lot of niches to fill in the world, and if you love computers and coding or whatever (I don't speak that language so just piecing together what I can from your post), then give that a whirl before trying the coffee/gaming gig. I'm sure whatever your other interests, there are some ways to use your coding skills to contribute. Using your highly honed skills to create a change in the world that you want to see will be a gift that you never tire of. Trust me. Speaking from experience. Your skills are a tool, and using them to advance a cause you believe in (doesn't have to be world changing--I'm talking about personal things), even if only a little, is something you won't regret.
I couldn't disagree more. Mixing top-tier television for entirely too much money with some of the greatest people I've ever met was amazing. Having to do it in Los Angeles was soul-killing. I suspect you've never lived somewhere truly shitty. I couldn't agree more. Austin is Boulder in the middle of flat Nowhere, Texas and Boulder is just an annoying upscale suburb full of white people who think they're ethereal.Having a job you like is more important than living somewhere cool
(and personally, I've always found Austin to be highly overrated as far as America's cool cities go)
You say that? Yet I seriously considered relocating to Flint, even after watching Roger & Me. To you? Tucumcari is a fictional armpit. To me? It's where you get gas on your way to Dallas, where you stop in Amarillo because there's a Bennigan's there that doesn't card. Detroit certainly has its detractors. It also has its boosters, and holy shit are they vocal. The regional pride around Detroit is possibly greater than the regional pride around Chicago, and that's saying something. I haven't been to Detroit? But I've been to Chicago and I get where they're coming from. It's lovely. I had to drive two hours to get to Breaking Bad. There are shittier places in the world than those I've been. There are shittier places in the world than those I've lived in. There are definitely shittier places than those I've visited. But is the police department whose SWAT team raided your babysitter by mistake subject to a Netflix docudrama? Yeah, yeah. Detroit sucks blah blah, rah rah Detroit rah rah rah. There's an extremely cozy upscale white loathing of Detroit that's very much like a Philly Cheese Steak: "This is so bad you have to try it." People disposed of dead bodies in my neighborhood in LA. The cops would fly over it in formation, six birds in vee, as a show of force against the place that gave birth to anti-gang statutes. Detroit is the Hamburglar - a pretend villain who mostly giggles and steals snacks to increase consumption of Midwest whiteness. Sorry for not having a sense of humor about this? But you don't have any friends who scared off the skinheads by slashing his own tongue with a switchblade and saying "I'm not afraid to die, are you?" and I'll bet you didn't know what a curb smile was until American History X. So I maintain - you've never lived somewhere truly shitty.
I fully trust you that NM sucks...never been; have no reason to go. But to argue that LA is worse than Detroit just doesn't square with my experience. Detroit's murder rate is about 10x LA's. Detroit has little to no cultural influence, and there's no geographically interesting shit either (beach, mountains, other things that make for a nice existence, etc.). I've never lived in LA, but I've visited many, many times, and while I'm not going to say that visiting is anything like living, I don't even put them in the same league. Fuck, I lived in the nicest part of Detroit and a girl got stabbed literally on my doorstep for telling some youths to turn the music down. And the cops told her not to talk that way to hoodlums and didn't even bother investigating. Whether this place or that place is worse is maybe not a great argument, but Detroit is a straight up shithole, and no rah rah attitude from any well-meaning suburbanites is ever going to change that.
There's a creative scene, for sure. Some people really like it. Almost none of those people are homeowners or parents. Which I guess is just not cool by some definitions, so take my opinion with a grain of salt. I enjoyed my time there, but not under any illusions that I wasn't at the top rung of a giant shit ladder. It' certainly nicer than at any point in my life, but that's a really low bar to clear.
I think it's an optimization problem based on the person for job you like vs. place you like - also how much commute you're willing to tolerate, and I think that swings across the pendulum over time? Boulder at least has the benefit of having amazing trail running and rock climbing. Outside of that, uhhhhh I wish everyone would shut-up about both of those places. Been to Austin, it's fine, but not mind-blowing or anything.
Both Boulder and Austin suffer from the fact that they're "fine" places that the locals insist are THE MOST AMAZING PLACES ON EARTH with THE MOST AMAZING FOOD ON EARTH with THE MOST AMAZING THINGS TO DO ON EARTH with THE COOLEST PEOPLE ON EARTH and it's like "have you been outside of Texas/Colorado?" What New Yorkers do for bagels, people in Austin/Boulder do for life.
Which is funny because better bagels come from Vermont and Montreal, anyway.
Montreal Bagels Represent 🤘 As far as touristy food goes, I actually have cream cheese with bagels quite often. The bagel shops run 24/7 to keep to wood ovens going, so it's the perfect after-party snack to soak up the booze. Still hot, miam. And of course you get a dozen so you have 10 left for breakfast the following week. (also a foolproof sorry I came home so late offering)
Food for thought: (1) fuck Google, yay Firefox (2) okay so is living with your family severely negatively impacting your mental health (note: I knew it was living with my parents that was the problem, even though it was free)? It did mine so I'm moved out even though it wasn't the fiscally smart decision and that was the right move. Roommate was shit, but it was still better than living with my parents. How is it affecting dating, finances, mental health, etc. (3) moving to Austin locks you into a remote job or a job in Austin. Right now you have the ability to job search anywhere on the planet. The moment you move to Austin, you're locked there for the lease term at the very least. Are you okay with that? (4) Saving money even if for no particular thing is great. I saved a fuckton while I was living with my parents and my shitty roommate and it's allowed me a lot of liberties now that I've moved to Atlanta. You might feel like you're not saving for anything, but those savings are a freedom. Moving is expensive. Opening and operating a boardgame cafe is probably expensive. If these are your goals, how will dropping all that savings affect these goals? It's a tough decision and one only you can answer. Good luck.