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Which magazines do you subscribe to?
Man, so I'm reading through this interview with two of the original employees of Stumptown, and this quote comes out of nowhere:
- Just pay attention to life.
And full disclosure, yeah, I do (still) like Stumptown, they're not the best but they have some really cool origins. But there's something so simple about that.
Just pay attention to life.
It's so simple, it's so vast, and it might be a bullshit quote but I am really into it right now. What else can you do but pay attention to life. I'm still hurt but improving (limited to 20 miles running per week, no more than 5 miles at a time), so that sucks. But I bought a bike, still have a great girlfriend (stoked for our Valentine's Night date), and the year is filling up so-goddamn-fast I had to make a calendar to even attempt to keep of track of it.
It's hard to just pay attention to life.
Darn. I'll be there in two weeks for a training.
In my defense I was drunk.
How far are you from Austin?
Wait. I thought you did live in Texas?
I was one of the people watching. It was a coming together of a many cross sections of society, all because of a single person. And that is, and was, beautiful.
Yeah, see, and to WanderingEng too, I never really learned how to maybe healthily compete with myself. It's part of why I like running so much, or going on bigger and longer adventures outdoors, to see what I can do. I don't really accept limitations of my body, and instead try to push through and figure out how to strengthen myself to push the limit further and further from where it's been in the past.
But it also becomes a not being okay to have limits mindset. Anyway, I'm running to the gym tonight.
It's really grating because I'm already going to the gym 2x-3x a week, doing some exercises at home 5x a week, and, you know, have been strength training for over a year now. Because that's my only option. Saying "cry me a fuckin' river" assumes I'm not already or haven't already been trying to work through this shit. I am working hard at this, and already realize I have to work harder than most people to achieve similar results.
Yesterday was hard, I finally have to start confronting something I've been avoiding. I was born with or developed in childhood external tibial torsion in both my legs. This is not even a little conducive to distance running. My only option is to manage it and continue to strengthen basically all my muscles and tendons in my lower body. Even then, I'm more likely to be hurt running long distance than the average runner. To add, my movement efficiency will never be great because a lot of power is lost when pushing off my feet due to this alignment.
I might never be the runner I want to be, due to something completely out of my control. That's a hard pull to swallow. I don't like feeling constrained because of something out of my control, and right now, I do.