a thoughtful web.
Good ideas and conversation. No ads, no tracking.   Login or Take a Tour!
comment by coalsenats
coalsenats  ·  2440 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Wanted: Male teachers in U.S. schools

Thanks for sharing.

In the past I've thought about looking into the Big Brother organization in my town. A coworker was telling me about how her daughter has benefited greatly from her mentor, but her son is perpetually on a wait list due to a shortage of males. I think my lifestyle and mentality would make me a good role-model, and perhaps this is the wrong kind of motivation, but I think it would be fulfilling to be of service to a young person like that.

What makes me reconsider is articles like these, coupled with the reality of me living in a smaller town where reputation means quite a bit. It's sad to say, but the rape-allegations-stories make me immediately think, "Nah, not worth it right now". Even if they are rare. I don't know.





kleinbl00  ·  2440 days ago  ·  link  ·  
user-inactivated  ·  2440 days ago  ·  link  ·  

    What makes me reconsider is articles like these, coupled with the reality of me living in a smaller town where reputation means quite a bit. It's sad to say, but the rape-allegations-stories make me immediately think, "Nah, not worth it right now". Even if they are rare. I don't know.

The fear of this stuff is out of sorts with the reality. We live in one of the safest human societies ever created. The chance of you or anyone you know being a 'victim' of this stuff is darn near zero. But with the media and social media and movies of the week it seems much more prevalent that it really is. Ask someone if there are more or less murders than a decade ago; the answer is fewer by about 1/4. Most people you ask that question will answer that there are murders everywhere. Yet the DOJ says that if you are not a part of the illegal drug trade the probability of you being a crime victim are nearly zero.

So, how do we fight this garbage and get everyone to tamp down the emotional over reaction?

coalsenats  ·  2439 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Totally agree -- I find myself repeating that sentiment to family, coworkers, etc. often.

If that question was given to me, I'd say more people should take a risk and not reinforce these stereotypes in reality (in my case, go out and volunteer for BB). If enough people did that, those who read these hysteria-inducing stories would have a real life counterexample to call upon. "That's weird, all the men I know working in childcare are great people".

StillWaters  ·  2438 days ago  ·  link  ·  

I've seen far more stories of female teachers being accused of rape than men, but maybe that was because I mainly pick up those stories on reddit.

I strongly believe that anyone who behaves appropriately and has healthy boundaries will not be at risk.

I also think it is dangerous to assume the rape allegations are false. It is well known that pedophiles are particularly drawn to roles where they exercise power over children (priests, coaches, teachers, scouts, etc) so there will be a higher preponderance of such people in schools. That should not discourage non-pedophiles from taking such jobs. Quite the opposite: you can help combat pedophilia.

goobster  ·  2438 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Big Brothers/Big Sisters is a brilliant organization, and if you feel the inclination to serve your community in this way, go in and talk to someone.

It is a big decision (no pun intended) and their vetting process is impeccable. They are used to talking to people about how things work, the level of commitment involved, and ensuring people are fully informed and fully committed.

It is, after all, a child's life we are talking about, here.

All that said, my Dad is a Big Brother, and he was President of Big Brothers of Greater Los Angeles. My sister is a Big Sister. And I opted out of becoming a Big Brother because my life was in chaos at the time.

Go in. Talk to them. Even if you are just thinking about it, they can help you get your head around the "unknown unknowns" that you haven't even considered.

It is a big commitment, but also hugely rewarding.

coalsenats  ·  2437 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Thanks for your input. I will likely stop by their office and get more info next week, after my summer semester ends. I'm sure there is a lot I haven't considered.

flac  ·  2439 days ago  ·  link  ·  

(going to undelete my comment once I edit it to make it more coherent)

flac  ·  2439 days ago  ·  link  ·  
This comment has been deleted.