I am sorry for getting mad at you, but I think you hate me without caring to know anything about me. I was too upset to write anything reasonable.

I deleted my account, because I really didn't want to be blamed for 8bit leaving. I really didn't want to get into how privileged or ignorant, I may or may not be.

The black lives matter movement isn't something, I am in love with. My mother works, in the ER at a trauma, drug rehab, and psychiatric hospital. She had me at 17, and only became a nurse a few years ago. She dealt with repetitive movement injuries, and unfair labor practices at a meatpacking plant, to raise me.

She is much tougher than the young girls she works with, and is often assassinated the most violent and difficult patients. She goes home, with bruises, and bites from alcoholics, too alcohol dependent to go to jail. She saves their lives, and gets beaten up as thanks. Or by people who are arrested repeatedly, but fake chest pain, to avoid jail.

She has someone suing her for malpractice, who says she went out and bought $3,000 dollars worth of crack, just to plant it on him and get him in trouble. Her lawyer says, to put the house she is saving for in my (morally iffy) stepdads name just in case.

The guy was pretending to be passed out, so he didn't have to give a urine sample. His lawyer says that he has PTSD from her telling him to wake up, or she will catheterize him. She needed the analysis of his urine to see what was wrong, and people don't get in trouble for testing positive for drugs at the hospital.

I agree with many parts of the movement, I just think there are innocent people in the way of really safely policing. Medically if someone hits or throws rocks at a police officer too many times, it affects their brain, and ability to use a firearm at the correct time. She treats quite a few officers as well.

Also I do pretty much hate COPs and the drug war. I am a bit more respectful to police after living in Detroit for two years. You really learn what you are missing there. This is part of the reason that, I lam stuck living somewhere that is pretty devoid of smart people to talk to.I really was too upset by the propaganda, I posted against my better judgement to argue any of those points. It's not that I don't think it is unfair or an just that people murdered by racist police.

I really wanted to talk about that it made no sense that the crowd was that mad. It is one thing to protest and physically intimate police, and another to do the same to a crowd of people aligned pretty similarly. I am volunteering caucusing in Iowa, the first state to vote. I wouldn't feel very good if I talked poor people into making sacrifices to make a donation, and the event they paid for was overtaken. Not to mention the hours spent organizing.

Now I feel like the whole thing was a stunt that went just as planned. They probably made so much money this week.

About Reddit, there are feminists on there. There is a subreddit called TrollX, where girls make gifs, to get the link karma the boys deny us, and talk about our problems as women. It is very silly and fun. I also argue about TV shows way too much, but it is hard to find people who are caught up and interested.

Another thing I do on reddit, is talk to other people with schizophrenia. I give compassion and understanding to people, trying to figure out how to move on with their lives. I actually have yet to have anyone on there stalk my posts, or bother me there.

We talk about experiences with bad medication, with people who are gaining weight uncontrollably, who's hair is falling out, sometimes drooling, sweating, and oh so many other unignorable side effects. We also talk about religion and the nature of consciousness.

I don't want to be an activist about this achizophrenia, or make it a cause. Climate change is the most important cause to me personally. I also don't think that this will ever be solved as a social cause, the medical option is so much better. I really don't want to get into my personal experiences of being discriminated against, but it is not easy. There is no dialog of what you can, and can't say that people foaming at the mouth enforcing online. I really hope there never is one.