Hey everybody. I didn't expect this to become such a big hubbub, and as such I don't really have much of an idea how to respond. I'm going to break this up into smaller bits.
What I meant: Exactly what I said. I've seen you do the "NO" thing in two threads and I think it's annoying. I think that that turns into pandering to people who share your opinion.
Why that isn't correct: I'm not the word police. I don't control what you do. You shouldn't need to defend yourself for giving an opinion.
Your comment: I don't care about any rudeness that you showed me, I started the shit-fight.
8bit and TNG's comments: I didn't actually perceive either of these as insulting towards me. I took them more as a "Q, quit being a prick, you're acting stupid" sort of signal. I don't have any idea of how they were supposed to be taken.
Muting: I've gone on a muting spree on Hubski, and in the heat of the moment I muted you as well.
Badging: I thought your "badge of honor" comment would be funny if it had an actual badge.
I wanted you to stop. I didn't want to hurt you and I'm sorry that it happened. I'll keep my negative thoughts to myself. It's kind of funny (in an unfunny kind of way) that my comment was probably less of a "quality input" than yours. It doesn't sound very genuine now after this post.
Let's see how this'll work for now.
- I've seen you do the "NO" thing in two threads and I think it's annoying. I think that that turns into pandering to people who share your opinion.
If I remember correctly, that other thread was some time ago, no? I had nearly forgotten about it. In any case, it now seems to me that this conflict arose from differing conceptions of Hubski. I see the 'ski as (amongst other things) a place to share emotions and opinions with a welcoming community, which sometimes gives rise to my sharing visceral, perhaps not well-thought-out reactions. But you perceive these reactions as "annoying" and even "pandering", so clearly there's a disconnect here. Care to explore with me? How do you view Hubski?
Rather than respond point-by-point to the rest, I'll just say that I appreciate your analyses and apology. I'm sorry for the role I played in our conflict, but I think we've managed to turn this whole affair into something eminently valuable.
(PS Badging my "badge of honor" is hilarious)
E:
mk, will Q see this reply? He still has me muted but it's a direct response to one of his comments... I just don't really understand mute mechanics in general.
I saw this message a minute after it was posted and I've been trying to think of why I feel like I do. I honestly can't think of a "deep reason" for it. The political side of Hubski is one I really don't enjoy. I don't agree with people on here and I don't like conflicting opinions, apparently. The "news" section is the only one I dare to dive into and even that becomes too much sometimes. It feels like everybody has the same opinions on the things that happen. It's unfair, but I view it as pandering to each other. "Yes, I also agree. Me too! I agree." When I saw your "NO" comment, that was the only thing I could think of. It looked to me like just another example. I took some frustrations out on you.
Honestly, at the time I didn't like you. I wasn't doing well and, like I said, I went on a muting spree. I didn't view you as someone to be nice to. I'm sorry for that. I've unmuted you. You seem fine enough.
I am happy to read this. We need more dissenting opinions, and we should all work to be tolerant of them. After all, we are all to some extent, ignorant, baised, and wrong. Only by discussing our ideas with an open mind and a willingness to civilly disagree can we all more to a better, more-informed place.
We all benefit from the opportunity of civil disagreement.
- I see the 'ski as (amongst other things) a place to share emotions and opinions with a welcoming community, which sometimes gives rise to my sharing visceral, perhaps not well-thought-out reactions.
Hubksi is indulged with a plethora of people who have interesting opinions which they can successfully discuss at length. If you become used to that, I guess there's a risk of adverse reactions to comments like the one in discussion.
I understand the intent of the 'NO' as an impassioned disagreement. I also agree that the word count of a comment means very little. And it is of course great that you feel comfortable expressing emotions and opinions here. But emotions should seldom be left to their own devices. The 'NO,' to me, represents your emotions more than your opinions. To some it may seem empty of thought and reflection.
Whether that's true or not is irrelevant. But you must seek to be conscious of these things and how your comment will read to both those that agree and disagree. A potential reason that Q sees it as pandering is because the only person who can concur with it is someone who already agrees with you. There is zero analysis of anything.
Next time you have urge to make a similar comment, or any comment really, take a step back. It is as important to interrogate your own views as it is everyone else's. Both its standpoint and the way it's written. I personally like to imagine that each comment is my first. That each one is my first impression. I try not rely on people remembering who I am, how I feel, or my typical demeanour. Of course, the beauty of Hubski is that you can procure that kind of relationship with people. But on a medium where anyone from across the world could be reading my words at any time, I find it an appropriate approach. Though I'm likely not always successful.
People do this all the time-- especially to people they either don't interact with much, or that they probably won't see again. One problem with a text based format is that comments don't fade into the air.
Most people have enough trouble with group dynamics in the real world-- that is, in interactions that have been shaped by evolution and culture. Here, we lack context (as in facial cues, intonation, body language, etc.) as well as a clear definition of the etiquette of hubski's culture.
Maybe one of the steps to making an account should be to sacrifice a goat or something with the existing users.