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comment by lil
lil  ·  4320 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Tell Me A Story Of When Someone Was An Asshole

    but he's still trying to convince himself it was kind of hilarious.
That might be the most painful part of the story. He's your brother and you have an unresolved difference of opinion about what is appropriate behaviour (even while drinking) and what crosses the line. If he sobers up and sees/admits his contribution to the unpleasant situation, then you will be able to feel safe around him. If he does not see his contribution to the situation, you begin to disconnect from him. I suspect, though, that the disconnection began earlier and you had some idea of his behaviour. So, my question is this: Were you surprised at this or did you have some kind of clue from past incidents?
    Tell Me A Story Of When Someone Was An Asshole
Here's my story of when someone was an asshole, since you asked: Am I an Ass?




user-inactivated  ·  4319 days ago  ·  link  ·  

    As the students were leaving, one of the boys approached me slowly. "My girlfriend says that I break phones," he said.

Oh, wow. That's a rough one.

lil  ·  4319 days ago  ·  link  ·  

He was so disconnected from his own behaviour that he framed it in terms of a second-hand report: "my girlfriend says . . . " note also, the power of stories to make it possible to see himself.

humanodon  ·  4319 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Gross . . . I hope he gets better.

_refugee_  ·  4320 days ago  ·  link  ·  

I like that story. Thanks for sharing.

Unfortunately, in the clear light of morning, I believe my brother has now devolved into being offensive and even more of an asshole to egg me on.

I had always known my brother was superficial and I have also known he can be an ass, but I can't say I ever anticipated that he would publicly insult a stranger. He was feeling a bit bad about it last night when I was dressing him down in the car, but his defense strategy is to insist that something is HILARIOUS, even when it's awful. In order to not feel bad about it, I suppose. (Hey, I'm not saying it's healthy behavior.) So I feel like this is a lot of shitty qualities in my brother coming out and snowballing.

We have two concerts planned in the next two months and I don't think I'm bringing him. (I pay for things up front and he pays me back, usually, so I have both sets of tickets.)

Anyway, thanks again for the comment.