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comment by veen
veen  ·  351 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Pubski: May 2, 2018

"There is an enormous amount of luck and randomness in the world. Hope is believing that in spite of that, the game is still playable."

Objectively, my attempts at online dating are going well. Subjectively it's a whole 'nuther story. I'm acutely aware just how difficult it is to take a step back when something feels so personal. I mean, on the one hand I've had more dates and lovely conversations in the last three weeks than the years before. On the other hand I've also had more rejections and ignores than ever before. It's just something I have to deal with, but it does make me wonder just how much luck and randomness is involved. I mean, I can get along with pretty much anyone, but finding just that kind of person to share my life with means being in the same place at the same time and doing the right things.

What's important is that I stay true to myself. It's easy to build a protective wall around oneself, and I know that will only hurt in the long run. The last few dates I think I succeeded pretty well at that.

kleinbl00  ·  351 days ago  ·  link  ·  

"You only have to be right once."

-Mark Cuban, badly paraphrased

sgeorge  ·  351 days ago  ·  link  ·  

I feel I hit the universal lottery when it comes to online dating, but as mentioned, just be yourself and don't expect anything and you might be surprised. Best case, you find your partner and love of your life. Maybe you'll find some people that you enjoy their company for a while and find yourselves incompatible in the long run, but remain friends.

My experience was that I was looking for friendship and people that I could connect with, and I made that well-known. I wasn't looking for anything serious at all, let alone a husband. But life is full of surprises.

Seek friendship, and who knows what will happen.

goobster  ·  351 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Good on ya, my friend.

Be a person worth dating - someone who isn't grasping for someone else, because yer drowning - and a person worth dating will naturally gravitate to you.

You are doing all the right things. Keep it up. It pays off in the end.