In a recent post, eightbitsamurai wrote about (among other things) building an identity besides the one others project on you. Ultimately he said, "I’d like to be whatever I damn well please, and let my actions speak for my personality. Not my skin color."
Being "whatever I damn well please," though, is not a slamdunk, regardless of race, especially when skin, race, gender, orientation might put us in danger. When in danger of being bashed or assaulted, we might "be" different on the outside. How do we go about feeling, finally, comfortable in our own skin? It sounded to me like an opportunity for free association word play, but these questions can take you anywhere you go. I'll post later...
I'd like to be whoever I damn well please
I want to walk with ease
and feel entitled
to breathe the air
to breathe the air
to breathe.
I'd like to be whoever I damn well please.
The world around me does not prevent this, but the demons dwelling inside.
I want to feel compassion. I want to feel kind.
I want the courage to leave jealousy and hatred behind.
When I think of the people who have changed my life,
I wonder why I'm not more like them.
Sincerity, support, and genuine, smiling eyes.
What makes me lesser in character?
Why do I lack that love toward mankind?
A mindfulness of this, I hope, will change me in time.
I'll mold my character and be the light we all hope to find.
The word entitled has strange connotations with me. I am not disputing your point, but I think it could be made better with a word that leans more towards the point you are making. I reserve using the word entitled in situations where the object earned it, or is somehow more deserving of it than others. The way one dresses often times has more impact on how people build your identity than your inherit traits. Same can be said for how one carries themselves. Fake it till you make it, perhaps. If one dresses and carries themselves as if they walk with ease and portrays as if they can breathe the air, then over time people will come to see that person as one who does so. Sorry, I am way off topic. nice poem =)
I think of the word "entitled" when I meet people who do not feel comfortable in their own skin, or people who are not confident. I meet people who don't think they are entitled to have their own dreams, people with low self-esteem who let others control them. They don't feel entitled to their own lives and choices. I think of entitled in a democratic way in the sense of we are all entitled to see the sunrise - it's there for all of us, we're entitled to our feelings, we're entitled to oxygen. There's more -- but I can also see how the word has other meanings. I agree with you about "fake it till you make it" - acting confident helps one feel real confidence.I reserve using the word entitled in situations where the object earned it
That makes sense. There's also negative connotations around feelings of entitlement, as if the word implies superiority.
I suppose I am cheating because this is an old poem. But I have a lot of difficulty with this prompt. For me, the question | How do we go about feeling, finally, comfortable in our own skin?| is something I've grappled with for most of my life. I write a lot about bodies. I think there's something inherently weird about having a body. I don't believe in souls but sometimes, to hear me talk about bodies, you'd think I do. It's not because I think we exist outside of our bodies but I often feel trapped in mine. So for me feeling comfortable in my skin might be harder around other people but it's still something I have to deal with alone as well. My initial reaction to this question was "Change my body," and I don't think that's where you were going with that lil! Haha. My top two choices for mutant/superpowers would still be Mystique and Tonks. I think to truly become comfortable in our bodies we have to accept them. Maybe I can write something humorous about how I'd like to be a man and have a huge cock ;)
In closing: I may come back to this and try to generate something new. But for now this topic has stumped me. #17
I dream. I think…
…if I can shrink enough,
my skin might lose its colored tone. Then we
could look through it, and see my heart. It’s tough,
worn down by stress, but still. We’d find my lacy,
brittle bones and watch dark blood drive down
the highways that my veins traced into place. The lands
inside, revealed for once, are turning brown
because drought spreads. The farmers protest, stand
and raise their voices, but the weather will not change.
What perfect skin! It digs itself into
the grooves of my sharp skeleton, it feigns
a perfect fit. Day by day it grows
a little loose. At least it doesn’t sag. Each night
it shrinks, pulls closer in. Then I wake up tight.
Your sonnet is very moving - Is this from a series of sonnets?I think to truly become comfortable in our bodies we have to accept them
or change them and then accept them. In any event becoming truly comfortable seems to take time and experience living in our bodies. This is one area that affects individuals regardless of gender -- but particularly affects transgendered people who feel VERY VERY uncomfortable in their own skin.
Yes, it is. One summer I wrote 50 sonnets. From those I pulled out a collection of 5 that I called my "Starvation Suite." They were published online but unfortunately the magazine has now gone defunct, so I don't think the other four are available for reading anywhere. I'm glad you enjoyed it.
Concept splintered, threaded together
Tangled outfits of neural nets
The outside put together:
I am the monitor and the camera.
The mirror exists in me and I am the mirror.
I watch myself writing
You shaped by your gorgeous skin.
Can't I demand of what you create of me?
Think of me without stereotype.
No shortcuts. Think of me as a thoughtful edit.
Think of me as sexy. Think of
My eyes. Sparkly no?
They are windows though
My soul by upside down spark
Of your own optical nerve
And then a gestalt.
Question: In the next line, do you mean though? I keep reading it as "through" which is what I am seeing as I stereotype the "th" and the "ough" into being another word.
I like that challenge. I'd like to spend a day without stereotypical thinking about anything - wide open to direct unmediated experience.
Of course - that's what social networks, like hubski, allow up to a point. Think of me without stereotype.
Wonderful line... No shortcuts. Think of me as a thoughtful edit.
Think of me as sexy. Think of
My eyes. Sparkly no?