I agree, there is nothing like knowing the only reason you live is because you will to live. Carpe Diem.

The hardest thing I've ever done, hell I dont know what to call it. Taking control of my life? Lets call it that. I was brought up very fundamentally christian and it was overboard even for the bible belt. I also loved nature shows and science, can you feel the cognitive disanance growing? To top it off I have recently been diagnosed with a mild form of aspergers and am certain everyone in my family, save my mom, suffers to an extent.

For me this led to a perfect storm of not understanding how humans worked socially, not knowing how normal non religious society functioned and whatever purpose and meaning my hardships had was lost when science finally destroyed my religious sentiments.

This left me in a place where I was lost, suffering from isolation and bullying, and there seemed to be no way to escape. At this time I had no explanation for my lack of social skills as I was not diagnosed. In my view I was simply a square peg in a round hole.

Ultimately this led me to suicide. As I held a loaded gun to my forehead I decided, YOLO. All the things I never did because I was raised to feel they were wrong I would do. I would try my best to digure out how to be 'normal', thru behavior adjustments. With help from a very good friend I finally overcame but it took years and I still feel like I struggle with some issues.

Now I am the most normal in my family, have a good set of friends, a wonderful fiance and a great, if not stressfull life.

SBG, keep your head up. I'm rooting for you. You sound like your able to look the nasty truth in the eye. If you can do that and still keep on keeping on.. your doing better than most.

Of course my family counts as my safety net. We are very close, at least on my mother's side. My parents have taken very good care of us and I will probably be taking care of them in the future. My fiancé has always had my back as well. Besides them and my friends, there is one friend in my circle who has gone above and beyond so to speak. I'll call her Shirley. Me and he met in college and I was always there for her, she was always there for me. We had an attraction but I never made a move; but I feel that's why let it grow into what it did. She was always 'that' girl it was clear after a while I didn't see her like that. She had a way of overlooking my shortcomings. I worry that our bond has taken a hit because of my fiancé (jealousy), but hopefully she still feels that friendship. I know I still do.

They shouldn't promote more attendance by letting in people with lower test scores. Besides the social effects prescribed in the article, it is inherently unfair and goes against the spirit of 'non-discrimination by race.' Instead what they should do is provide more support to those students of color who are unable to attend college for financial reasons. If there is systematic oppression going on then this has manifested in the fact that people of color don't have the same financial resources as other races. By addressing poverty we address the real issue and we fix the problem by bringing up one side instead of pushing the other down.