rule 0 of wage's house is be naked all the time rule 1 is can i borrow your car rule 2 is if you don't have work today, you get to clean the dishes rule 3 is i am allowed to blast music between noon and eight and i don't give a fuck if you work night shift cause so do i rule 4 is watch the pressure cooker, nobody wants to die in a hail of bean shrapnel rule 5 is wipe down the griddle when you're done rule 6 is don't turn off the blacklight or the lava lamp rule 7 is close the lid rule 8 is goddamn it peter stop doing the dishes you aren't any good at this i'll do it rule 9 is goddamn it peter edit: in practice i break rule 3 cause my headphones are pretty great
Nobody wants to die in a hail of bean shrapnel I will walk through my day imagining this as the first line of a novel called Curse of the Flatmates -- Is it a murder mystery -- a love story -- a Kiwi vampire story (a la briandmyers)? We shall see.