I think that ranting on the internet about something that bothers you in a place where others can offer commiseration and perspective as well as opinions on what happened can be a good thing. It can help distance you enough from the situation to think about what happened and what might be done the next time something like that happens again.

Since you asked for stories about when people were assholes to us, I'll tell one about some minor assholery.

Yesterday I was grabbing some food before I got on my train out of Boston, where I'd seen The Presidents of the United States of America the night previous. They are really, really good live and interact with the audience really well. Anyway, that night my friend introduced me to a cocktail called a French 75 which is delicious and refreshing. Then, we got on the moonshine and at the show a whole mess of Jameson.

So, hungover as shit, I go to get a breakfast sandwich and of course some hashbrowns, because if I have a weakness, it is hashbrowns. Especially crappy fast food hashbrowns. By all accounts I walk quickly. I check the time and see that I have a few minutes until breakfast service ends and just as I was about to hit the counter a rather . . . grossly overweight college student barrels in and shoves me aside with her massive bulk and orders the remaining three hashbrowns. She even gave me a look as she walked away eating them.

I was bummed out, but shit, if you're willing to shove a dude aside to get the remaining three hashbrowns, then your piggy little fingers are welcome to the mind controlling transfats they're steeped in. I just hope she gets poop in her next sandwich.

To get back to your story, it sounds like your brother is embarrassed and trying to cover it up by claiming it was hilarious, which is lame. Responsibility for one's actions is definitely not lame. I don't know if you've ever tended bar, but sometimes it feels like you're in a cage and there's slack-jawed yokels throwing peanuts at you. If you don't learn to let things slide to a point, it'll grind you down quick. Anyway, I think kleinbl00 has some good points. Especially in saying that you need to make it clear to your brother that it's not cool what he did and that what he did affects other people, like yourself. I know that if I saw someone else recognize a shitty situation and take initiative to correct it or at least draw attention to it, I'd be grateful.