Communication is such an important part of life, and you're right it is amazing that we have personal relationships that don't fall to pieces, especially across the gender line. I'm often curious as to why my wife asked my opinion on things like what she should wear, where we should eat et cetera. Her: Where should we eat?
Me: I'm up for anything.
Her: Please just pick somewhere.
Me: At this point I will name four different restaurants of different varieties
Her: No, none of those sound good how about "X"? It's obvious to me that she had "X" in mind the entire time, why don't you start out there? I can't figure it out, but I continue to play along.
2. maybe also she wanted to see more what "I'm up for anything" meant. When you open-heartedly suggested four different restaurants she could see that you were truly up for anything and gave her the confidence to suggest X. 3. eating out carries all kinds of cultural baggage: guilt (I should be cooking); energy level (he might be too tired); financial issues (I'm being extravagant) etc etc etc -- the conversation described above allows for some of the unconsious tension and fear of rejection to dissipate.It's obvious to me that she had "X" in mind the entire time, why don't you start out there?
1. maybe not though -- maybe hearing your four suggestions helped her realize/remember X.
My wife will does the exact same thing! I first noticed it when she asked my opinion on what to name the plant she received as a gift. I said Frank, to which she replied, "No, I think Fred". I'm not sure why she does it and when I asked her about it she wasn't entirely sure why does it either. I think it's just that she wants to know that I care enough about things in our life to have an opinion on them.
Part of my New Years resolution to be a better father/ husband. I figure if I surprise her with something every day (in a positive way) ill be off to a good start.. I think it's just that she wants to know that I care enough about things in our life to have an opinion on them.
I think you're onto something here, my wife refers to it as "participating". I think it's her way of making sure I am present and engaged in what we are doing. Something I'm always striving to be better at. Speaking of which, she's just pulling up the drive and I've made her this:
Wow, that looks amazing! Tofu? And kale? Super yummy, I bet. That's a great resolution, one that will reap many rewards for all parties involved.