Eyes on the prize: we're talking about people who can't engage with the opposite sex (because we're talking about straight people, invariably) closely enough to initiate intimate contact. The how and why isn't the subject here, but there's a lot of how and why between the lines:

But then, most the time, I feel just fine with my single life. I mostly think I would like to have had sex just to be "normal". To get it over and done with.

I wish a man would obligate himself enough to me that I could cross this off my list. A born romantic here.

About 10 years ago I remember sitting with a group of friends over a drink and the subject came up of losing your virginity and I just fled the room when it came to my turn. One of the others came out to find me and they'd assumed I'd had a bad experience of some kind.

I lack the social skill to not erupt in dire trauma in the middle of a bar when the subject of sex comes up.

I also have backed away when I have noticed a woman showing what I have interpreted as some interest in me. I have reacted in the same way you do when you pull your hand away from the fire - but it was the opposite of what I wanted. I have always, every day, longed for something that I have succeeded in avoiding my whole life. And I certainly dont blame the women.

I am perversely proud of my drive and passion for avoiding the opposite sex, despite my love for them.

I blame my ethnicity, my religion and, when all else fails, my weight and my face. It's not easy to be not wanted by anyone.

There's clearly something wrong with me but I refuse to fix it, whatever it is.

The incel idiots, on the other hand, aren't about "there's something wrong with me." They're all about "there's something wrong with everyone else on the planet."

Humanity… All of my suffering on this world has been at the hands of humanity, particularly women. It has made me realize just how brutal and twisted humanity is as a species. All I ever wanted was to fit in and live a happy life amongst humanity, but I was cast out and rejected, forced to endure an existence of loneliness and insignificance, all because the females of the human species were incapable of seeing the value in me.

Did you know that Elliott Rodger's manifesto was 141 fucking pages? 105,000 words? That's some narcissism right there. None of the letters quoted by the BBC are even vaguely narcissistic. The quote you list is a man who is doing his level best to rationalize his way out of the term "virgin" ("but that's another story").

Another story indeed.

Edit:

Oh my fucking god I've never actually thumbed through Rodger's manifesto before. This shit reads like Thomas Fucking Harris.

I am not part of the human race. Humanity has rejected me. The females of the human species have never wanted to mate with me, so how could I possibly consider myself part of humanity? Humanity has never accepted me among them, and now I know why. I am more than human. I am superior to them all. I am Elliot Rodger… Magnificent, glorious, supreme, eminent… Divine! I am the closest thing there is to a living god. Humanity is a disgusting, depraved, and evil species. It is my purpose to punish them all. I will purify the world of everything that is wrong with it. On the Day of Retribution, I will truly be a powerful god, punishing everyone I deem to be impure and depraved.

Yeah sweet jesus lemme find some Red Dragon quotes

“Before Me you are a slug in the sun. You are privy to a great Becoming and you recognize nothing. You are an ant in the after-birth. It is in your nature to do one thing correctly: before Me you rightly tremble. Fear is not what you owe Me, Lounds, you and the other pismires. You owe Me awe.”

The whole article reads as a PUA seminar recruitment flier.