You sound like you need to be even angrier. There is a hipster hole here that serves sliders, sushi style. I grew a top-knot and Silicon Valley douche beard just entering the place.
You're adorable. 1) Three sliders and fries is gonna cost me $11.50. That's a buck or two off Red Robin pricing. 2) Their name is conventional: (proper noun)'s (food) (locale). Bob's Steak Shack. Mary's Burger Hut. That shit is not kosher. 3) They have $3 Coors Light on tap. You wanna come, come correct, mutherfucker. You know what $3 gets you at Plancheck? A fucking pickle. Fuck, dude, you don't even have KETCHUP LEATHER™. yes there's a fucking Atlantic article about fucking ketchup leather. Oscar's? I mean yeah they charge you 50 cents for ketchup which is pretty douchey but at least they don't prohibit you from having any. Fuckin' slider bar. Mutherfucker. Oscar's uses BeerMenus.com, which is also used by my local (proper noun)'s (food)(locale), Big T's Moonshine BBQ. Know what Big T serves? Moonshine. And barbeque. They got fuckin' Rainier on draft. ButterflyEffect lists some legit hipsterish joints up here but oh holy fuck dude you have no idea. Maybe I needed to be even angrier.
I've been called many things in my life, this is a first. Red Robin. I had to look them up. (I don't go out to eat much, sue my adorable ass.) They look like a higher end Homerun Burger in a sit-down setting. Double Bacon and rings is my go-to about once a quarter-ish depending on if I am stuck in town or now. I like them better than 5-Guys. Normally if I go out to eat I go to some of the Amish places where the food was herded into the back of the building slaughtered and shoved into an oven or onto a grill. Grizzled old women with gnarled hands stir pots of sometimes questionable ingredients that taste amazing. If I could find a way to make an Amish costume and recreate the "ambiance" I bet we could make the new hipster hangout in a place like L.A. I'm kinda cool with that statement. I go out to eat something I don't want to/can't make at home. I'm not there for the "experience."You're adorable.
ButterflyEffect lists some legit hipsterish joints up here but oh holy fuck dude you have no idea.
Red Robin is, for all intents and purposes, Chili's or Shoney's or Applebee's but without the pretense of making much more than burgers. They're solidly okay. And while I would deeply enjoy some Amish hilarity in the middle of LaLaLand, the charges of cultural appropriation would be funny at first and then downright fucking terrifying. I'm hoping you could hear the jealousy.I'm kinda cool with that statement.
Dude make them take you to that amish place. Red Robin is where you go when you've convinced your mother in law that you're never going to Applebee's and you just can't handle the f'n Spaghetti Factory. If you're off on a business trip in a strange city and you're meeting at an office park across from the mall and you have an hour for lunch, Red Robin is a safe bet.