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comment by goobster
goobster  ·  2446 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Ask Hubski: How do you guys work to avoid engaging in gossip at work?

Stopping is deceptively easy to do, and extremely difficult at the same time.

Shut your mouth, and don't respond.

Gossips think they are being valuable and helpful by sharing information.

They are actually making themselves look small and petty and untrustworthy to everyone within earshot.

So when someone says something shitty/wrong/gossipy, don't respond. Just don't. Dig into the work that is in front of you on the screen, and don't respond.

Then, don't open your mouth. Don't spread gossip. Don't speak about anything except work. When conversations turn gossipy, turn back to your work.

Gossip lives on echoes. It wants to hear itself repeated back, and emphasized.

If you fail to feed it, it goes away.

And suddenly you look like the only reliable/trustworthy person in the office, because you don't engage in the gossip.

People also feel the social pressure to get back to work, when someone else is working diligently and not participating in the gossip. So simply by not responding, you can make it a healthier work environment for everyone.

(I've been living this, working as the only guy in a group of 9 young women.)