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I'm aware of these things and others. But when I feel good people think I'm doing good. I don't get full on manic. My step dad told me how good I sounded recently. After I told him I'd been up for somewhere in the 30-40 hour range. Then I crash and no one expects it or understands it. I didn't even notice hypomanic episodes until years later with retrospect. I'm sick of this shit too. But I've had to fight, often alone, for help and it's pretty awful.