a thoughtful web.
Good ideas and conversation. No ads, no tracking.   Login or Take a Tour!
comment by jleopold
jleopold  ·  3400 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Dear hubski, what would you like to say to your 17 year old self?

I agree being 18 doesn't magically make one an adult, but I also think that the world starts to see you as an adult then. So, if by the time you are 18 you don't feel mature enough to take on these responsibilities, you need to get good at faking that maturity. The world is going to start piling stuff onto you, so hopefully you're ready. If not, hopefully you can get ready fast, or get good at faking getting ready, because the saddest shit is that thew world just doesn't give a damn if we're ready or not.



user-inactivated  ·  3400 days ago  ·  link  ·  

    but I also think that the world starts to see you as an adult then.

Not necessarily. There are cultures - like Russian - where confrontation, especially in the family, is not appreciated as far as sincerity is concerned. This means that people won't tell you what they really think on important subjects ("I think your life choices make you go down the slow and painful path when you can do more"). They won't push you or hold you accountable any often, so you won't learn to perform as a child. I was still very much a kid when I was 18, and the university studies - which rely heavily on one's own preparation - nearly crushed me. Faking ain't gonna do good for ya if there's nothing to back it up, which, by definition, makes it real.

But swedishbadgergirl is Swedish, so I'm sure there's nothing like that for her to worry about. Scandinavian countries are very different from Russia, and given how high their quality of life is, I'm sure she's in a good society to become an adult without crumbling onto herself.

---
swedishbadgergirl  ·  3400 days ago  ·  link  ·  

I believe faking it til you make it is a good strategy.

Because even if you hate training doing it will still give you endorphins and even if you aren't motivated you still might get some work done.

---
user-inactivated  ·  3400 days ago  ·  link  ·  

That wouldn't be faking, then, would it? It would be doing, thus real.

---
swedishbadgergirl  ·  3399 days ago  ·  link  ·  

I think we disagree on how much feelings/motivation influence the "realness" of someone's actions.

---