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comment by user-inactivated
user-inactivated  ·  2949 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: I'm done helping those "in need"

Thank you for your kind words and your bit of guidance.

How do you distinguish those who actually seek help? It seems to me that I've never met such people, and if I have, I've missed or ignored them.

goobster  ·  2948 days ago  ·  link  ·  

That's an art, not a science.

We all know people who always have some drama in their life. Don't bother with them. This is how they define themselves, and without drama they would be at a total loss.

There is no prescription for who is deserving/desirous of your help. It's like... there are some homeless people you give money/food/attention to, and there are others you don't. It's a gut feeling, and it can be surprising how smart your gut is.

And, like archery or badminton or woodworking, helping people is a skill set that you hone over time. But keep doing it. Keep learning.

And take a break sometimes to take care of yourself. You are letting people drink from your well, and if you don't take time to replenish that well, it'll run dry.