Broke up with a girl in 2001. September 13, in fact. Gave her the apartment September 13, 14 and 15, and came back to discover my ass completely cleaned out. Like, couch, bed, 90% of the CDs, everything gone. Wandered over to Fred Meyer and bought a 32" Trinitron television, a claw hammer, a party sub and a box of condoms. Did not get to use the condoms nearly soon enough. Used the party sub immediately. Two weeks later, had to buy the same goddamn mattress and the same goddamn bedframe again, despite the fact that I'd bought them six months previously. Still loving both. PROTIP: you can probably get by with a carpet sweeper until things get dire.
Haha! I wonder what the incidence of party sub use vs. condom use is. Somewhere, someone got a grant to fund this research, I am sure of it.Wandered over to Fred Meyer and bought a 32" Trinitron television, a claw hammer, a party sub and a box of condoms. Did not get to use the condoms nearly soon enough. Used the party sub immediately.