Sarah needs to toughen the fuck up. 12 years doing business on the internet and she's never gotten a nastygram? Or learned how to deal with them?
Valerie is likely not that interesting a person. 10 emails a day, for a girl, on a dating site is pretty sad. I have a friend who I very much like as a friend but from a romantic standpoint, isn't my type. She's.... prickly. We were on match.com at the same time. I got maybe an email a week.
She got 90 per day.
HERE'S WHAT SCHLUBS LIKE KEVIN DON'T UNDERSTAND:
Everyone is friendlier in person than online because everyone gets more cues on personal interaction and affinity in person than they do online. Online, you have to build your own.
The data varies widely, but ballpark semiotics experiments and anecdotal data tend to indicate that a phone call transmits about 20% the data of a face-to-face meeting, and a typed memo transmits about 20% the data of a phone call. In other words, in order for an online discussion to slot into the same level of understanding as a face-to-face conversation, we're synthesizing four fifths of four fifths of the discussion: 96% of the meaning in the interaction is entirely receiver-generated. If an online conversation were a meal, the actual data generated by the person on the other side of the screen wouldn't even cover the tip.
I'm not saying I wish the Internet were a meaner place. I just understand that same as the fuckheads who cut me off in traffic are human, the fuckheads taking too long in line at the supermarket are human and the fuckheads texting their friends in the movie theater are human, there's only so much capacity for "human" in my head and I necessarily need to reserve that for the people who matter to me.
If "Sarah" had half a clue, she would have called up her client as soon as she got the damn email. And if Derek weren't such a White Knight he'd recognize that if speed dating is no place for social niceties, neither is OKCupid and sweet holy jesus what kind of stalker hell is he setting Valerie up for?