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comment by mk
mk  ·  4731 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Facebook is making us miserable
So, what should we do to avoid these three traps? Recognizing that "quitting" Facebook altogether is unrealistic, we can still take measures to alter our usage patterns and strengthen our real-world relationships.

What? Quitting Facebook is unrealistic? No, it is not. There is a perception that it is unrealistic, but it is very doable. People quit Facebook every day.

I log into Facebook about twice a week. Only about 5-10% of the 'friends' I have on there seem to be very active. Maybe these are the miserable ones? It's pretty predictable stuff. Mostly from women and girls that I know. Kids looking cute, political statements, something they are doing for charity, on vacation, etc. It's okay.

I'm not on there enough to keep up with invites or any kind of discussion. It's not a very good social platform. It seems to be more about sharing photos and things that you like. Not about engaging communication.

I think Facebook better watch out for pinterest.com. They seem to have figured out what a very large number of people use Facebook for.

Look at this: http://www.alexa.com/siteinfo/pinterest.com





cgod  ·  4731 days ago  ·  link  ·  
I have a Facebook account, but reveal almost nothing about myself with it. I think I have posted exactly one time on it, only to announce that Armageddon is nigh because I finally got a FB account and a cell phone. You could probably find out a few things about me via my wifes account, but her security is high, and baby pics won't tell you much about my life.

I think it's mostly worthless. If you have nothing better to do with your life then talk about yourself and help others talk about themselves then it's probably a feast. I have thought about posting every book or album I read or purchase to FB, it would be more interesting then any "cgod has checked into a random shitty restaurant." Like most peoples blogs, I find that FB makes every one seem less like someone I wish I knew then having a real conversation with them.

An odd thing, plenty of people I don't really care about have friended me on FB (this is aside from the real friends I have that have friended me), but the half a dozen people I would really like to reconnect with are unfindeable on their platform. I don't know if there is some kind of anti-FB quality in people I value or what.

lessismore  ·  4731 days ago  ·  link  ·  
I still don't get Facebook. It probably would help if I joined the network, but I just don't see the benefits of having an account outweighing my privacy concerns.
ecib  ·  4731 days ago  ·  link  ·  
So I probably log in less than mk, -about once a month, maybe twice. I actively dislike Facebook. But....everybody is there. If you've never been on the site, it's hard to understand just how finely tuned their process and algorithms are that steer you to find everybody you have EVER known (and conversely have them find you as well).

So in effect, there are a ton of friends and acquaintances on there. A few months ago I was in NYC and wanted to hook up with an old friend of mine who moved out there, but I had lost her contact info. I logged onto Facebook, sent her a message, and lo and behold, 15 minutes later I get a phone call and we made plans to get together that night. Quite useful.

For me, Facebook is pretty much just a social address book that populates itself instead of me having to track everybody down in real life, which I would never do. It's kind of a corner case, but that's what I use it for, and I won't delete it for that reason. Other than that though, it's pure hatred, and I'd love for everybody to be on a different service someday :)

thenewgreen  ·  4731 days ago  ·  link  ·  
I used to use it a lot to invite people to "new green" shows. Now that we aren't playing live shows any more, I'm really considering abolishing my account. The only thing that keeps me there are the things mk mentions... pictures of my daughter to share with my family that live away etc. My entire family, including my grandparents have FB accounts. -How messed up is that? My grandparents are on FB. That tells me 2 things: 1.It must be a pretty easy to use interface 2. FB is super lame. I used to be on there a lot more before I started hanging out here too.
forwardslash  ·  4731 days ago  ·  link  ·  
I used to have a facebook account which I used mostly as a sort of extension of my social toolbox. All of the conversations you have with friends about what you've done and are going to do fit nicely within your profile and network of friends, allowing you to keep in touch even when you can't visit with someone in real life. Unfortunately it became a replacement of social interaction instead of an extension. After I had deleted my facebook account I had situations where people asked why I wasn't at such-and-such a party or get together. I simply told them I had neither heard of the event nor had I been invited, to which they consistently responded, "Well, it was on facebook".

I also didn't like how it really diluted the meaning of the word, 'friend'. People's friends lists would swell to huge numbers and some of them they would barely know at all ('we were at the same party this one time') or outright not like at all.

I can see the benefits of having a service not unlike facebook, but for me at least the benefits seem to have become drawbacks.

mk  ·  4731 days ago  ·  link  ·  
Yeah, I found out I was invited to an event after it happened, because the invite was through Facebook, and I just don't check it that much.

It's kind of sad that when you are using a service just because you feel like you have to. I think that feeling creates a lot of resentment.

I deleted my LinkedIn a few months ago, and it felt great.