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Falling_Off's profile
Falling_Off

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following: 7
followed tags: 31
followed domains: 2
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hubskier for: 3218 days

recent comments, posts, and shares:
Falling_Off  ·  3202 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: All Women Are Replaceable

I suppose I should have looked at the domain before following the link. This is very red pill. I like how the guy said his wife's job was to take care of the baby so he shouldn't ever have to wake up for night feedings. He sounds just like my ex-husband. I'm sure he would've loved a job where he needed to work all day and night and was on call permanently with a new call every 2-4 hours, including through the night, without ever being able to pass the responsibility on to a partner to finally catch a little rest during the weekend. I'm really surprised more women don't have postpartum depression with how many are expected to bear the full brunt of raising a child without support.

Of course the problem here isn't lack of support, she was totally just gleefully robbing him of all his wealth while being selfish and uncaring. There's no way all of this behavior was a cry for help, just shove a new car in her face and everything will be fine. Oh, that didn't save the marriage? Well somehow it is still evidence that women have the maturity of a teenager and just want a provider to give them shiny things.

Falling_Off  ·  3207 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Spouses of Hubski: how much did you pay for your wedding?

Mine was about $2,000. $600 for the dress, $500 for the photographer, and I guess around $1,000 for the rest. We had the wedding and reception at a small bed and breakfast that supplied the caterers. Our cake was made by a Mexican baker who had done lots of quinceañeras, and while the decoration came out different than I wanted (probably due to the communication barrier) it was still beautiful and delicious. The reception was in the afternoon so we had drinks and hors d'oeuvres instead of a full meal. The ex and I were both introverts so we only had I think around 30 guests, mostly family members. There was a champagne toast, but we didn't have an open bar.

We definitely were going for a budget wedding. It was rushed, too, because I found out I was pregnant a few months after we got engaged. It turned into a bit of a shotgun wedding to get on his insurance for the pregnancy. We pulled it off in just two months from when the pregnancy was discovered. It was good to only have two months of wedding planning stress, but I would not recommend a shotgun wedding, personally, nor do I recommend getting knocked up before the deal is sealed.

This was several years ago, before trigger warnings were quite so prevalent, but I've certainly seen plenty of negativity towards them since then. I've never personally seen a need for trigger warnings, but I don't understand why people are so hateful towards those who want a bit more politeness. The SJW hate is a little baffling to me as well. I can understand being uncomfortable with extremists on either end of the conservative - progressive spectrum, but SJW seems to be used on reddit about how socialism is used on Fox news - as a scare word to attach to anyone you feel remotely in disagreement with. It seems to not have a very specific meaning. It's more of a boogeyman I think.

It's a shame that people get accused of being a white knight so much when they express sympathy for a woman's situation. Most of the supposed white knight behaviors seem like showing some basic empathy, solidarity, and respect. If anything, the world could use more of these supposed white knight stereotypes, but some people online ostracize that behavior as if it's as shameful as pedophilia. I can understand it being off-putting if a guy has a history of showing fake or exaggerated sympathy to woo women, but there should be nothing wrong with guys showing a bit of compassion now and then. Of all the slurs that get directed at men, I think white knight is probably the best of the lot. What many consider a white knight falls under what I would consider well adjusted. I'm sorry your friend got raped, but thanks for sticking up for victims. I'll respect folks like you way more than I'd ever respect a juvenile minded person who thinks insulting a person's sympathy and their partner's faithfulness is better than having a respectful dialogue.

Falling_Off  ·  3212 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Norwegian feminists protest against female conscription

Just because one feminist group supports inequality in this manner doesn't mean that all feminists feel the same on this issue. Why not abolish conscription altogether? There are a wide variety of beliefs that fall under the umbrella of feminism, plenty of which are focused on not just making the world a safer and more equitable place for women, but also in discarding gender roles that hurt both genders. One such gender role is the stereotype that men are more brutal and less nurturing than women which leads to male-only conscription and also stigmatizes men who take on the stay at home father role and while their wives take on the role of primary earner.

That being said, I'm personally undecided on the issue of conscription. While it's great not to force unwilling participants into war, the military seems to prey on the underprivileged in our society. By having an all volunteer military we have much less protesting against the rush to war such as the conflict in Iraq because nobody has to fear getting dragged into it who didn't already sign up for the military in the first place. I think having the draft brought more accountability to the government when it decided to go to war and while it didn't prevent us getting bogged down in nasty conflicts, it did force the government to think harder about the cost of the human lives it was sacrificing. I do think the draft should be equal, personally, in whatever direction it goes in. If we really need people to serve so badly that the draft is reinstated we should pick the best and brightest of 100% of our population, not the best out of 50%. Women may be physically weaker on average but there are many positions where strength doesn't matter such as linguistics, computer security, the medical field, and drone piloting, just to name a few. Aside from that, there are plenty of fit women who can far outperform the out of shape couch potatoes when it does come to physical tasks.

Falling_Off  ·  3213 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Mapping the U.S. by Property Value Instead of Land Area

Detroit gets so much bad press though. I'm not sure a lot of people want to buy cheap property there and risk not having a police force that is able to protect them from crime. People don't usually rush to buy property in the ghetto areas of big cities and Detroit's national press gives off the impression that the whole city is a blighted, dying ghetto with an inadequate police force. I think you'll sooner see telecommuters moving into moderate sized cities near quiet farming communities than you'll see them moving to the rust belt, and within the Midwest why not move to places like Indiana or Ohio that don't have the same reputation of being corrupt and run down?

I mean no offense to Michigan, I've got family who lives in the area and the state has some real beauty, but I don't think most of America hears anything good about the place.

I think part of the issue is entrepreneurs want to be close to the source of their money, or to future potential financiers. It's probably easier to find a venture capitalist to fund your ideas when you're in a financial hub and it's probably much easier to network in general. A face to face meeting simply gives off a better impression than e-mail, phone, or even Skype, and you're more likely to rub elbows with influential people if you live in the same geographical area as them.

Falling_Off  ·  3213 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Why You Should Not Be Afraid To Eat Raw Food

I do like cooked carrots and bell pepper so I'm not completely against those. In fact, peppers in general are some of my favorite vegetables as salsa is the one way I truly love raw veggies. I also eat onions raw on salad as well, sparingly, but otherwise cook them. I'm not flat out against raw vegetables, but I don't find many palatable. I've never liked celery or cucumber, unless the cucumber is in pickle form. I don't even enjoy celery cooked, unfortunately. I've always been rather picky. I do like salads when topped with a good vinaigrette type dressing so not all hope is lost and I agree that there are much better types of lettuce out there, but I will pick iceberg over arugula any day.

It's good that you like vegetables as I'm sure it'll pan out well for your body and mind in the long run. I force myself to eat vegetables to be healthier but it would be a lot easier if they were a joy to eat, so I could never begrudge you your joy.

Falling_Off  ·  3213 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Why do you live where you live?

I'd classify my current place as transitional. I live with my boyfriend and his parents in a rural town. I moved here because it's only an hour away from where my daughter lives, whereas before I lived with my parents across the state and it was a 5 hour drive to visit my kiddo. In the short term I'd like to move to the nearest big city once I'm done with school and in the long term I'd like to move to Europe but that'll probably have to wait until my daughter is an adult. I just don't like the lack of social support here. I'd like to live in a place that sees value in supporting children and has a better safety net for those who have mental health issues. I'd also like to live in a place with a decent transportation network. Living in such an isolated area means I have to drive everywhere and never walk or get exercise. I want to be in a place where it's easier for me to walk around so I can't be as lazy. Until I moved here I had always lived in suburban areas and I miss being near a city that actually has things to do all the time.

Falling_Off  ·  3213 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Should Men Be Allowed to have Multiple Wives

Thanks for fixing the article. I've got multiple friends who are polyamorous so this lawsuit will probably be big news in that community. I'm not sure the case is so cut and dry though, there are a lot of government benefits such as certain tax breaks that come along with marriage and I'm afraid the government might think that allowing multiple spouses to one person is taking advantage of that. Divorce in a larger party like that will be a complicated issue to work out as well, whereas gay marriage doesn't require any major reworking of the legal structure underlying marriage besides possible custody issues from the outside biological parent.

I got attacked by someone for discussing a rape experience on a rape support subreddit very early on in my reddit days so I stopped clicking the envelope altogether. I didn't stop sharing my views and personal experiences in subreddits because I know there are people in the world who could use the knowledge that others have been through the same thing (my aforementioned post was basically a detailed "me too" in response to someone else) but I just had too much anxiety to see whether another jerk had come out of the woodworks. By just reading the subreddits themselves I knew there were moderators and down votes to handle the worst offenders and well, the attacks weren't likely to be personal since the front page has a high turnover rate and I was unlikely to come back across a comment I made.

Falling_Off  ·  3213 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Should Men Be Allowed to have Multiple Wives

Edit: complaint fixed, blocking this part out. The title of the link asks about multiple wives but the text of the post beneath the photo was about non-violent drug offenders instead of marriage. I would've liked the link to explain the story of the Montana man you mentioned, who I'm guessing is pictured.

My question about the marriage would be could women also take two husbands? I am not personally a fan of the style of polygamy where only men may have extra spouses but I think consenting adults should be free to structure their romantic relationships in whatever way they agree to so long as nobody is harmed.

Falling_Off  ·  3213 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: What Did We Learn From the Anonymity Experiment?

As someone who is uncomfortable with dogs and puppies I'd be happy to see trolls under that tag for the opposite reason - they're equally upsetting and great to avoid. I guess it works both ways!

It was rather confusing to see that tag in my feed on two posts that appeared to have nothing to do with dogs, however.

Falling_Off  ·  3213 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Why You Should Not Be Afraid To Eat Raw Food

I don't mind raw fruit, but vegetables are bland and bitter which I can't stand at all in my food. Cooking them lets them absorb the flavors of spices, sauces, and broth that I actually like the taste of which makes it a lot easier for me to incorporate vegetables into my diet. I'd probably have a wretched diet of pasta, meat, and dairy if it wasn't for the wonders of fragrant, spicy, cooked vegetables. I especially love the vegetable dishes at Indian restaurants. If I ever had to become a vegetarian I'd definitely have to learn how to cook Indian seasoned vegetables.

You guys that can eat raw veggies are real troopers. I once watched my mom bite straight into a raw head of lettuce and had to ask how she could stand to do that. It just tastes awful to me, personally. I wish I didn't have such sensitive taste buds because I know it's less healthy this way, but I'm just too used to flavorful processed goodies. I don't even like potatoes or French fries because those are too bland, even though frying is supposed to make everything magically delicious.

Falling_Off  ·  3213 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Why do you shower in the morning?

I shower in the morning because I have curly hair that becomes a frizzy mess if I brush it when it is dry and sleeping on it makes it too messy not to brush. So I shower, brush it, and let my curls air dry into a happy state for the rest of the day.

That being said, I'm not very active and don't do much to get sweaty or dirty so I usually only shower every other day. On the days I haven't showered I just put my frizzy hair up into a ponytail.

Falling_Off  ·  3215 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: What book has impacted you the most?

It's hard to say but at this point I think I'd nominate The Shock Doctrine by Naomi Klein. I used to be fairly libertarian leaning, but the more I've learned about the effects of laissez faire capitalism on countries that move in that direction, the more it has left a sour taste in my mouth. I never learned much about Latin America in school and this book's outlook on the coup by Pinochet in Chile was pretty startling. I don't think I knew much about Milton Friedman before this book either, but his style of economics is very much popular among the right and has been hugely influential over modern politics.

If you want an easily digestible primer on neoliberal economics, this book is a good starting point.

Falling_Off  ·  3215 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Are you going to vote for Donald Trump?

People were making a big fuss about John McCain's age when he ran for president, but he's still alive and kicking today. In any case, I'd rather have an old guy who I think is the best fit do a few years of good in the White House and then croak before the end of his term than have someone mediocre (or worse) in there for the full term or two terms. Hopefully he doesn't pick the left's version of Palin for his running mate.

Falling_Off  ·  3215 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Are you going to vote for Donald Trump?

I like your theory. Sadly, not all of the candidates got the memo to burn Trump. Ted Cruz, the Hispanic Tea Party senator from Texas, is team Trump. Granted, he's of Cuban heritage rather than Mexican, but it just seems silly that he'd cheer for an anti-immigration guy when his own dad is an immigrant.

I suspect Cruz is just another foil like Trump though. He's not likely to win the nomination, but his presence makes the other contenders look less extreme by comparison. It's like marking up an item's price in a store so that the rip off next to it suddenly looks like a reasonable deal.

Falling_Off  ·  3215 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: What are your bedtime rituals?

I listen to music if the problem is that I've got too much on my mind to stop thinking. It drowns out distractions in my environment and provides a distraction from my thoughts. The rhythm and familiarity help lull me into sleep.

If my problem is just that I'm over simulated I'll read something dense and meaty that takes a lot of thought to grasp. I'll get too tired from trying to think too hard while sleepy and that ultimately quiets my mind and body. I use Plato's Republic or contradictionsinthebible.com. I really love the latter when I'm awake enough to reflect on it, but at night it is a one way ticket to sleepyville. Plato's Republic put me to sleep every time I tried to read it for school because the arguments are very circular and repetitive in nature. I really wanted to like it but my mind said no.

Falling_Off  ·  3215 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: What are your bedtime rituals?

It's for the best. Alcohol helps you fall asleep faster but it hinders your brain's ability to go into the REM stage of sleep that actually allows your mind to refresh itself. You'll fall asleep quickly and then feel groggy and unrested the next day when you use alcohol as a sleep aid.

Falling_Off  ·  3215 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Hubski on Chrome on Galaxy S5 (though likely applies for Chrome on other devices!)

Thanks for the reply and thanks to insomniasexx for working on such a quick fix. I see you guys all over the place and find it encouraging that you're all so active and responsive on here. Overall I love the look and feel of this place, keep up the good work!