- If they know what to call you -- they can call you for dinner. If they know what to call you, they don't say, ‛Hey you.’ They say, ‛Gee Anna, your story is great,’ or ‛Wow, John, that's a cool earring,’ but when you have no name, your identity is erased. You get blamed for other people's crimes. You disappear. When you have a true name, you are unique.
Stepping back from being an asshat for a second, but I think names are changing. No, not like court names. I think the nature of a name is changing. A couple decades your name was exactly what it said. You are John Smith. Your first name is John, chosen by your parents, your last name is Smith, chosen by someone in your distant past. Done. Clean cut, straight forward. You have one name. I have around 5 at this point, and I will recognize most of them if they're brought up in conversation, depending on the forum. My real name, the one I will always recognize, is Egan, which is a terrible name to have and never, ever name your children it. The other four or so names are JTHipster or some variation on it, Duke Lolington from earlier internet days, Nani? from even EARLIER days, and Askrew from what was basically my first day on the internet. Prior to that I had one off names like Soldier Boy (when I was 11 and liked Metallica. I stopped, I swear), or names of characters from shows if the site was a roleplay site (oh god I can feel women actively moving away from me), or the shitty AIM names I had. I think the actual earliest was railroadxing. Which is odd. I was never a fan of trains. But these are all my names. I will respond if called by that, and really in this day and age that's no longer viewed as taboo. Almost everyone has a second, third, or fourth name that they use, like so many masks they put on. It's strange seeing that when I look back, stranger still that I remember it. I could probably trace back most of my internet names to how I thought of them, if I really wanted to. Well, not the super early ones. Even so, they're not names like we think of; there's no genealogy, there's no history, there's no connection to family. Nothing like that. Depending on what groups you're part of, those artificial names are usually more important than the real ones. Think about how you would view me if my name was JTHipster9210. Or if it was jthipsta. xxjthipstaxx. Those are three different names that tell you vastly different things about the person. The names themselves are almost as important as the person behind them, and no, until the day I die I will never take anyone named xxxshadowfox666xx seriously. Ever.
even so, they're not names like we think of; there's no genealogy, there's no history, there's no connection to family. Nothing like that.
That is so true. Although a name like JTHipster probably has a genealogy - by which I mean to say, a story of how it evolved. I think the nature of a name is changing.
If the nature of names is changing, perhaps the nature of identity is also changing. I have trouble keeping track of multiple names/identities. I find it very frustrating when my name has been "taken" by someone else. I sometimes have to resort to using a term of affection that people call me (noodledish) and even then, I have to be noodledish22 or some such.
The older I get, the more integration I seek. I don't want anyone to say, "Wow are you ever different when your sister, wife, husband, grandmother, or smartphone is in the room."
I think thenewgreen is on hubski so much that he has fully integrated tng into his Steven personality. Or have you, tng?
lil, thenewgreen was an enormous part of my life well before Hubski. I remember sounds_sound telling me he would have chosen his name differently if he knew he'd remain on Hubski. b_b, if I did refer to myself as tng to my wife it was either tongue in cheek or to annoy her. I don't go around referring to myself as such.... Not yet.
Fwiw, I dig the name Egan. Perception is a funny thing. If I could have chosen a different name it would have been more unusual than "Steven." People with straight hair wish it were curly and the curly haired folks dream of straight hair. If you were to have had a choice if your "actual" name would it have been more conventional? Great point about the modern take on multiple names. I have emailed b_b before and used his Hubski handle to refer to him. He promptly let me know that outside of Hubski he's not b_b. Names matter and where you use them matters too.
http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20130213005641/fallout... clearly you know that this is not what the question is about.
JTHipster is right. Written names consist mostly of letters and spaces. All written language does. But spoken names are full of much more. What's in a name? 1. associations 2. identity 3. often history and genealogy 4. destiny -- if you had been born Fielder, Walker, or Homer you would seriously consider becoming a baseball player... and many other examples. (my Grade 6 5 teacher: Mr. Book; another teacher: Mr. Boss.)
Weirdness. so today I posted this article about Harvey Pekar. thenewgreen replied with a link to caio's post here, all about what is in a name
I found the timing of this post to be pretty serendipitous given our exchange. lil, you had no knowledge of this ahead of time, right? Just want to confirm that we weren't in cahoots. As for the name tag idea, nice work! Did it last till noon? Being a substitute teacher for an 8th grade class sounds like my definition of hell :) That is precisely the age when I was the worst to any authority figures. I saw substitutes as a means by which I could "entertain" my classmates through their humiliation. I wonder if substitute lil could have handled 8th grade new green? Regarding names, I was out to dinner with a friend last night that is about to have their first child. They don't know the sex yet and have several names for each gender picked out. We both agreed that names seem less important to men. My name is Steven and I don't think about that very often. I honestly don't care. My wife loves her name and I know women that hate their names. I don't really know any men that have an opinion either way on their own names. Does anyone have a similar experience or am I way off here?
I know men who have had name changes or mused about it anyway -- and many men who Sting-like" use a different name on stage. My friend, dub poet, Klyde Broox changed his name from Clyde Brooks, adding "k" from Kunta Kinte (*Roots*) and the x from Malcolm X. As for the name Steven - I know another Steven, a poet -- he's in the book I sent you. In one of the drafts of the book, we accidentally wrote "Stephen" and he was enraged. He sent a long email detailing the differences between Steven and Step Hen (the name of the somewhat hated current Canadian prime minister).
But you have a point. I know many more women who have had name changes... also there's that whole name-change marriage thing, so perhaps women feel more fluid about their names anyway. A woman's name mostly follows the patriarchal line. I have a female friend who changed her name to her mother's original name, while at the same time realizing that it was her mother's father's name. 1. Did it last till noon - yes, it lasted all day. Once I gave them recognition and candy, I had them in the palm of my hand.
2. Could I have handled 8th grade TNG? I'd like to think that your 12-year-old self would have seen that I appreciated your spiritedness and we would have entertained your classmates together. But more likely, you would have driven me crying from the class. It would have taken you many many years to feel remorse, but it would occur to you sometime between the ages of 40 and 50 that you had been a little prick. We'd accidentally meet in an airport and you'd say, "Hey, weren't you that substitute teacher that I drove crying from the class 30 years ago. I'm really sorry about that." And we would have both been redeemed.