So, I actually haven't talked to a single person employed by Goodwill. This experience is interesting and somewhat surreal for me because, although I'm the "victim" here, or the target, or at least the person around whom everything happened, I'm an absolute bystander to the escalation. They haven't even asked to speak to me. I'd be shocked if the guy lost his job from this. It's pretty hard to fire someone for cause. A one-off like this might be a verbal or written warning, but unless he has a history of customer complaints or other issues at work against him, he's not going nowhere.
It's super-easy to terminate their contract for no reason, though. Especially as Goodwill primarily employs the disabled. Barring that, it's incredibly easy to make a disciplinary mark that prevents someone from ever being promoted or, in this case, ever be in a customer-facing position ever again.It's pretty hard to fire someone for cause.
well ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ look at me, the person in the situation who is literally not responsible for any of this happening, and doesn't have the magic ability to read men's minds and stop them from saying (or typing and emailing) whatever they want to, to whomever they want. At the end of the day, Goodwill doesn't care about me so much as they care about their disgruntled customer. As evidenced by the fact that Risk Management told my brother they'd like to call and discuss this with him further. Ain't nobody ask for me. I could be fiction for all they know. GW sees ruffled feathers; they'll soothe ruffled feathers. If they were worried about the law or the paper, I think they'd first at least ascertain my existence. I feel like if they were going to fire the guy, even, it would be due diligence to get my version - not fire a guy based on another guy recounting what the first guy said to the other guy's sister. And if they're going to fire him for "no cause" aka really hearsay, which means going through the trouble and expense of hiring someone new and burning the time to train them, AKA impacting their bottom line and all that corporate shit, well fuck. They'll fire anyone for any reason then. I haven't seen any headlines about Goodwill being trigger happy, have you?
That discussion you linked to last time? Remember my response? I wasn't there. I don't want to be there. But I also know that the Invisible Hand of the Marketplace is not known for its compassion and I know that people who unload rags for Goodwill are hanging on for dear life. It sounds like you wouldn't have done anything. Great. I wouldn't have either. Occasionally the folx at Goodwill act weird around my kid. I presume this is because they aren't firing on all cylinders. Might not be my most charitable assessment but I'll suspect people of stupid more often than I'll suspect them of mean. Exactly this. "Say the wrong thing and you're on the street." I recognize that you feel no culpability in this situation but if you honestly feel that no harm was done to you, you have an obligation to tell your brother to inform Goodwill that you feel no harm was done to you. I have a friend. He was a youth pastor at a Christian camp. Then an 11-year-old decided he was too disciplinarian so he told his mommy my buddy made him feel uncomfortable by talking about his penis. Now my buddy fixes HVAC for apartments. No hearing, no recourse, just "sorry, that's the end of that career." Let's hear it for at-will employment. I get that you're a bystander in all this. Do you get that continuing to be one is not necessarily the most virtuous position to take?The only person who can do anything about your brother's behavior is you.
They'll fire anyone for any reason then.
His email expressed that he and I both felt uncomfortable after describing the bare facts of what happened. And yeah, I did feel uncomfortable when the guy in his 30s-40s, closer to my dad's age than mine, asked if my two-years-older brother was my dad. That was fucking weird, man. And my takeaway is that he was trying to hit on me, yes. I've said elsewhere that if similar happened when I was in my own I would not feel comfortable returning to that Goodwill alone. It's up to mgmt at Goodwill to decide what their tolerance is. I'm not trying to be virtuous; I'm trying to be honest, and I'm trying to be me. Your friends' 11 year old, meanwhile, was being a vindictive bitch. How'd they turn out as parents? Here's a story. There's a grocery store near me I've avoided for 10 years because when I was 16 a lifer bag boy took a shining to me such that if he sees me, like he did last month, he comes up to me, tries to start a conversation, and if I "was nice" and just "humored him" and talked back he would follow me around the store for my entire shopping expedition or until whatever manager responsible for him saw what was happening and sent the guy away from me and back to work. I don't want to talk to this person. He's just as creepy as the guy at Goodwill. Actually, creepier, because I know I'm not the only girl he focuses on like that. Mgmt there deals with that by being a little more attentive and pulling him off of the customers he fixates on, getting him away from them and back to work. Funny how it always happens to be the cute young female customers he wants to make friends with, though, not anybody else. Acmecreep still works there. Yeah, I got to run into him like twice last month. Once he came up behind me and stood there for 15 minutes while I used the change machine. I can hear it now: "He was probably just on his break!" Yeah, that's a nice coincidence. You know how you were a kid once and you played "Not touching you"? You'd all gang up on someone and get as close as possible and chant "Not touching you, not touching you, not touching you!" And then when the kid was like "STOP!" you all were like "We're not doing anything!" and fucking rioted with laughter? How do you go about telling the special 40 year old who's a lifetime bag/cart boy to leave you alone when technically he's not doing anything? Just standing there six inches behind you doing nothing. Just watching you. When you turn in his direction you can see him straighten up and try to catch your eye. What I do is I go to different fucking Acmes. What a great solution, right. At least cartboy's not fired, I guess that makes me virtuous. Better call that a/c man because your anecdote just got burned right back. Kind of feel like goodwill is more like acme than Jesus camp when it comes to retention methods but hell, what do I know?
The basic problem - set aside that in your estimation, this guy is extra creepy - is that flirting requires violating social code. Period. Full stop. By any HR manual you care to consult, there shall be no fraternization at school, work or church, between providers and clients, between friends and neighbors, and ugh oh god who wants to meet someone at a bar they're so sketchy. Which means - set aside that in your estimation, this guy is extra creepy - that Western society effectively depends on people brave enough to risk a harassment charge in order to forward the development of relationships and families. I'm sure you've been through your fair share of cringe-worthy sexual harassment training at this point to know that the the gauge for "unwelcome attention" is "when the other person says it's unwelcome." But that's not what's happening here. The other person's brother is telling HR to tell you it's unwelcome. Your bag boy example is of an establishment you've avoided for ten years rather than tell someone "could you leave me alone, please?" In your example at the goodwill, it didn't even get that far. This isn't a case of not taking a hint, this is a case of three sentences exchanged. And yes. My friend's 11-year old was being a vindictive bitch. But just like you live in a world of creepy 300lb Goodwill loaders, we live in a world of vindictive 11-year-old bitches. You? I mean, your honor was insulted by a male of a lower caste and now your brother is demanding vengeance from his liege-lord. you might as well just put on the fuckin' niqab and be done with it. I don't understand how it can be feminist to require a world so nerfed-out that you never have an uncomfortable conversation with a male.
I avoid this Shwarma place since this one guy would spend the entire time asking me if I had a boyfriend yet or was married and telling me he wanted me to have his babies. That gets creepy by the time you get to the cash and the next time you come in. He stopped doing that to my sister when she came in holding her baby. I brushed that off sooo hard and just laughed yet I get uncomfortable thinking of going there.
This is complicated because she does feel there was harm done, it's just that it's an everyday thing that happens and she has figured out how to just brush it off so she can just move on with her life since there's no point in getting mad. As it builds up over the years you end up feeling like shit not for the way men treated you but for the way you let them by brushing all this stuff off. Then you see it happen to other young woman and you feel like shit for being a bystander and letting that culture continue so it could harm other young woman. Edit: _refugee_ I realize I'm projecting a lot here so correct me if I'm wrong but I'm guessing I'm not far off.