NOTE: This movie is available through Netflix online and this review contains minor spoilers.
Mike Birbiglia's "Sleepwalk with Me" is a culmination of many years of shows, practice, and thought. To be honest, I was reluctant to see the movie based on the trailer. For each moment that hit seemingly my sentimental chords, there was something flat that almost dissuaded me from heading out on a Wednesday evening to see the movie alone. Listening to a story about his first girlfriend encouraged me to take the nine dollar, seven minute walk plunge to the nearby movie theater, where I would be joined by a couple and a random group of friends.
Birbiglia's humor often is derived from his directionless wanderings through life. He doesn't seem naturally animated, which suits many of his jokes, morphing his tales into a long-form story as opposed to a more traditional observational humor. The recanting of his first relationship takes over eight minutes unfiltered, yet is an engaging, relatable story that takes care in respecting the human element of the actors, specifically mentioning that his understanding of the desire of his then expelled ex-girlfriends to attend their graduation in disguise, or as he interprets it, her attachment to a community she outwardly challenged, but inwardly embraced. He does not speak ill of the relationship, even though he recalls her compulsive lies and her condescending insults, only to be followed by a half-hearted, "only kiddin'," as he managed to convince himself of his importance to her and his luck in dating somebody higher up in the social order at their boarding school.
A common thread in Birbiglia's stories is his willingness to overlook warning signs in himself and his relationships, resisting reality even as it becomes apparent to listeners. Despite the lies and unclear relationship status, the consequences of his irrational and unrequited love are admitted openly. He describes, albeit briefly, the joy of receiving attention from a romantic interest and the highs and lows of delusional love. Birbiglia humanizes these unbalanced relationships, providing his anecdote as to how and why it happened to him in spite of his better judgment.
In "Sleepwalk with Me," where Mike Birbiglia becomes Matt Pandapiglia, and his narrative interjections to the story often remind the viewer that the story is true and that these events did actually happen. Pandapiglia has many bothersome qualities, relying on his girlfriend's sense of guilt to achieve the response he desires, while simultaneously hoping the best for her. Similar to the circumstances of his first girlfriend, Matt became infatuated with Abby in their sophomore year of college, due to her smile and her sense, as she viewed him as undesirable. Their uneven relationship began as a result of his incessant insertion into her life and later reaches equilibrium as their post-college relationship slowly approaching marriage. Certain aspects, such as his lack of comedic development over their eight years together, are left unexplained and point to the extended stagnation of his personal development.
It is clear that Matt is not ready for marriage, despite signs that Abby wants a commitment and a future, recording wedding and baby programs on television. He doesn’t voice these concerns for fear of losing Abby, lamenting that his friends and family believe her to be his best quality. As with many of his problems, he does nothing, remaining dedicated to his unspoken discontent. At his sister's wedding, Matt is forced to consider whether or not Abby is to be included in the bride’s family, and after stammering, is overruled by his parents, who invite Abby into the picture. Although his family views her as kin, Matt is reluctant to put himself in any position that even suggests future marriage with Abby, despite her obvious desire for vows. After the wedding, Abby throws a drunken tantrum and threatens to leave, only to be calmed down after Matt stumbles into a marriage proposal. They fail to set a firm date, and Matt subsequently avoids accepting the ramifications of his actions, leaving the wedding planning to Abby.
The disconnect between Matt’s feelings and actions manifests in his dreams as he begins to sleepwalk, worrying his parents and Abby, representing the gradual deterioration of their relationship. Matt skips a sleep study in favor of a low paying gig, quitting his job as a bartender, preferring to follow his newly reignited dreams. When his career as a comic begins to show signs of life, thanks to his small time talent agent, Colleen, he begins to enjoy the independent life that he missed for the past eight years. His comedic success is predicated on voicing a more honest appraisal of his relationship, sharing with the crowd that, “if you are ever in a relationship that is moving towards marriage, and you’re not ready, don’t go to my sister Janet’s wedding.” He shares these stories without Abby’s knowledge or permission, and they detail his underlying thoughts and concerns that he was unable to admit to Abby, allowing him to accept reality in a way that had been previously impossible.
“Sleepwalk with Me” culminates as the characters finally look inward for direction, rather than depending on external relationships. As Pandapiglia narrates the ending sequence, it is difficult to identify the line that separates Matt from Mike, and easy to feel like he is somebody that you know and understand, regardless of his character flaws. As with the story of his first girlfriend, Birbiglia manages to honor the humanity of his characters in his rare, comedic way, and succeeds in directing, writing, and starring in a film that is as honest and personal as any other.