It doesn't get better. That doesn't mean it gets worse. It continues. The capacity for improvement increases with freedom but that's not without the risk of a capacity for truly crushing failures.
"Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem," is some grade A "I want to throat punch you now," dismissive platidudinous bullshit that is usually trotted out by people who don't understand what it's like to not want to live.
Suicide is the ultimate expression of hopelessness. Keep hope alive and you can probably not get to that point. How? Understand that even if you are plagued with insecurity and a self awareness that makes you analyze every mistake and decision and character trait you have, that you are valuable for reasons you have to come to understand yourself