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comment by kleinbl00
kleinbl00  ·  776 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Millennials Aren’t Killing Industries. We’re Just Broke and Your Business Sucks

I took Honors/AP English in high school (surprise!). I didn't see grammar past 8th grade. My best buddies took bottom-of-the-barrel English. They were up and diagramming sentences by their senior year. What a fucking waste.

At some point in 10th grade they were slagging on how boring grammar was and I said something along the lines of "the only purpose of grammar is the stagnation of language because it calcifies old patterns and prohibits the tongue from adapting to the conditions and inventions of its speakers." One of them tried to make my argument to his teacher, who was so impressed that for years later he referred to grammar as "stagnating."

Which isn't to say he stopped teaching grammar.

    It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to Heaven, we were all going direct the other way - in short, the period was so far like the present period, that some of its noisiest authorities insisted on its being received, for good or for evil, in the superlative degree of comparison only.

THOSE VERY SAME SHITFUCKS that think this is somehow goddamn golden lit will lose their fucking minds over emdash vs endash vs semicolon vs eat-a-fucking-dick you pedants. I don't know if you've been out in the world or not but out here they think that for all intensive purposes you don't want to be the escape goat in this doggy-dog world. Out here they drink euthanasia tea when they have colds and think "quotes" mean "emphasis."

FUCKINGLETITGO

Especially when everyone is ignoring the web design that covers up the first three words of the goddamn sentence under question

And disregarding the fact that the top comment is like three seizing potatoes or some shit. Oh, I see - those are hand claps. Fuckin' beige-on-beige and we're all twitterpated over a goddamn semicolon?