We've subscribed to Blue Apron since... March 2013? I appreciate what they do. They're useful; I know three meals a week are handled and the rest I can figure it out.

But they've suffered since they've been made more accountable to their backers. We see a lot of repeats and generally, where things were initially a meat and a carb and a veggie, now it's a meat and a carb or a meat and a veggie. Meanwhile they've gotten a lot more... frugal. Last night was "burn some cabbage while cooking it with a russet potato while a couple pieces of cod get stuck to your other pan." Total cost of that meal can't be over five bucks but they charged us $20. And fuckin' A we've had a pink lemon every week for months. I get it - y'all got a deal. But pink lemon juice and shallots and creme fraiche is just a fancy way to say "tartar sauce."

At one point I had plans to start a blog called "Or Use A Zester" that catalogued all the stupid shit Blue Apron suggests you do in pursuit of food. They generally assume you have one pan, one knife, one pot and a potato peeler... unless they have two things that need to be cooked at once in which case suddenly you have two pans. Otherwise? "wipe out the pan". They will also create meals by going "boring, easy-to-aquire protein" plus "boring, easy-to-acquire vegetable" plus "bizarre condiment you would never eat otherwise prepared in a stupid way." Tonight or tomorrow I will be cooking chicken and rice with "stupidly fiddly deep-fried shallot rings because fuck you that's why."

Their instructions are also hit-or-miss. Sometimes they walk you through the eight steps necessary to cook a pot of rice. Sometimes they're all "fold the napkin into the shape of a swan."