a thoughtful web.
Good ideas and conversation. No ads, no tracking.   Login or Take a Tour!
comment by RicePaddy

Jeez, I thought I was pretty amicable bloke.

I remember the discussion I had with you, but I thought it was actually fairly level-headed. I remember it heating up toward the end, but I left it before it got out of hand.

Can you outline why it is that you think this is the case? I'd like to try and put the record straight with people who may have it out for me. Feel free to fire me a PM so we don't clog up people's global chatter!





tla  ·  3436 days ago  ·  link  ·  

I don't have it out for you. You're not blocked, muted, filtered or hushed. I just can't trust you, but since I haven't blocked you, I don't act on this lack of trust because of social pressure (aka zomgcensorship!!1!!11!!!!eleventy!!!).

Ok see the thing is, I'm a woman on The Internet. (The following isn't exclusive to gender, as eightbitsamurai has pointed out about a million times in the past. It's just relevant to my experience.)

The overwhelmingly common assertions are that I should stop being on The Internet if I don't like it when someone threatens my actual existence.

If you flip out and I get threatened by you, the consensus is that it's my fault for participating in The Internet.

Therefore, I am responsible for what other people do to me.

Even if I wanted to put protections in place but was convinced to not.

The only acceptable protection I am allowed, is to never participate in The Internet.

This is what it's like to be on The Internet for some people. I don't make the rules. I just break them.