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comment by hersheys
hersheys  ·  2707 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: What's your favorite question?

I always find myself wishing that people would ask me if I'm okay .





virginiawoolf  ·  2706 days ago  ·  link  ·  

After recovering from depression and being in a much better place that I used to be, I started asking people how they are. I do it every day, and I mean it. Mostly don't get a response, or get a 'good'. However, every once in a while, especially on chat, someone will say how they really are, and I'll be glad I asked.

Also, you mentioned that you are okay but if you're not, you can always PM me too. :)

user-inactivated  ·  2706 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Interesting side-note, if you ask a person with asperger's or related, "How are you?" it can freeze their brain. Because literally, semantics, to that person the question is imprecise, vague, could be asking about philosophy, biology, existentialism, existence in time, how you came to be...

This is why people with asperger's/autism frequently look blankly at you when asked a "simple" question. =)

psychoticmilkman  ·  2706 days ago  ·  link  ·  

I find myself sometimes wishing people will ask if I'm okay, but when it happens I always freak out and say, "I'm fine, I'm just tired."

So far no one's realized that "I'm tired" means "I'm freaking out and I need a hug", but I can hardly blame them for it.

user-inactivated  ·  2706 days ago  ·  link  ·  
This comment has been deleted.
psychoticmilkman  ·  2706 days ago  ·  link  ·  

I'm doing better. Day by day can be hard, but overall things are okay. Thank you.

And luckily I do have someone to hug me when I need.

Formerly_Me  ·  2707 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Hey, man, are you okay? You can always PM me if you wanna talk about anything.

hersheys  ·  2706 days ago  ·  link  ·  

I am okay actually, but thank you very much for asking .

Formerly_Me  ·  2706 days ago  ·  link  ·  

I'm glad, man. You've inspired me, though. I don't think about others enough.

HairyLenny  ·  2706 days ago  ·  link  ·  

See, when I do it, it's genuine but, "alright?" is used so frequently as a greeting here in the UK that the vast majority of the time, the person asking it doesn't really give a shit. It's sad because there are so many ways to improve a person's day just by giving a few moments just listening to their response.

I used to long for people to ask me, and when they did I'd say I was fine when I wasn't because I suspected they didn't care. No I am fine and when I ask, it's because I care.

There are customers in the store I work at who will now just wander round chatting to me while I work and they leave with a smile (and I smile too) just because I'm willing to listen to them.