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comment by user-inactivated
user-inactivated  ·  3190 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: 20 years from now what will you have wish you had done?

Oh, so many things, it takes too long to list them all (I just tried; erased the whole thing - hundred of words - halfway through). I've always measures my progress by the deathbed time - that is, the time when I'm on my deathbed, thinking back to the life behind me.

So, in short, by the time I'm about to die, I want to find a woman to both have her be perfect with me and be perfect with her; raise a few children in the most loving yet stern enough way so that they'll learn that there are far better things than thriving off others' misfortune and stomping down others' success; publish all of the stories I have in my notes (one of them - the semi-fanfiction Crystal Clear, based loosely off Dota 2's foggy lore and its characters - is now in production and is the biggest thing I've written yet already); make a dent in others' perception of reality by sharing everything of importance that I've found out while living; establish (at least the foundation for) the program that will teach children basic steps towards understanding themselves and others by informing them of such undiscussed-in-public things like emotions, how mind works, relationships, motivation and success and so forth; fly with the best personal flight tech available; shoot from a firearm; shoot from an M1911 (I'm in love with this pistol); shoot from a firearm with a suppressor on; shoot from an M1911 with a suppressor on (I told you); find out that I've helped someone to turn their life for the better; make a stubborn person think about what they don't want to think but what will make their lives better; travel, in Europe and North America in particular; learn a dozen languages (got two, learning two more, with a few more on the way; I love languges); make a few of my own languages (including those for the stories); film a movie, however short, of high quality; write an interactive story worthy of including in my collection of stories; make a soundtrack or a song (I love music); sing, either for a recorded song or for a public (either my own song or covering one of those I came to love); share the ideas that I found important off a stage; craft a bow and hit a target with it; learn to shoot from a bow with high skill; make my own piece of furniture; learn to cook delicious food; be strong, physically and mentally; feel my body strong and beautiful; learn to fight and defend those I want to defend; be shot by a small firearm with armor on (to feel the effect; if I could, I would also want to be shot without any armor on - I am this curious about various human conditions)... Too many things to write.

It's a grand challenge, and I'm finally ready for it. I've been living 20 years of my life for nothing, trying to impress people whom I don't even care about, sacrificing my passions in the process. Only recently have I realized how pointless it is; funnily enough, and it all started from me leaving the university and ending relationship with a girl I thought I loved. Let us shine bright and charge other with our light.