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comment by _refugee_
_refugee_  ·  4093 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Do you feel guity?

My answer would be no, I don't, not really. And I've done some things most people would consider terrible, and some of them have happened quite recently.

Sometimes I have felt guilty. I posted on #askhubski a long time ago about assholes because I'd been complicit in a situation where my brother was a giant asshole to someone.

I guess in that situation the way I managed my guilt was to first, accept my accountability for the situation, and then move on. I try to learn from experiences but I don't try to beat myself up too badly about them once they have happened. It's not productive. It doesn't get you anywhere.

For instance, you feel guilty because you don't feel like you're living up to your standards. Well then why don't you start taking action towards living up to your standards instead of just passively sitting back and feeling bad about it? I guess that is how I manage my guilt. I don't let it ride me and I figure out what I need to do to stop feeling guilty, and I do it.

You can't help being privileged. That's a silly thing to feel guilty about. It's like, do you also mail your leftover food to children in Africa? No? But that doesn't make you feel guilty, right? Because it would be preposterous and unhelpful to mail them your food, and also probably very expensive. You should appreciate your situation, you should feel very very lucky, and you should make the most of it.

Life is not fair and some people are born with advantages. You cannot help that. Do not feel guilty over something you can do nothing about. If you are still feeling guilty about being privileged then find a way to use that privilege to help others and give back.

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I think guilt is a useless emotion that allows us to feel like we're doing something - feeling bad about something - instead of actually doing something about that thing.