Yeah, I think if I had to sum up what you're saying, it's really to advocate for myself in this situation. You know, I had/have been seriously considering seeking a therapist to help me understand my dating patterns and to dig deeper into understanding and sorting through the people I am attracted to and the people whom I attract. You are aware of, jeez, the last 8+ years of by virtue of Hubski and our separate conversations. I wouldn't call it unhealthy? It is, however, something that seems to continually trend towards relational and emotional instability.Your best move is to say "come find me when you've figured it out, because you matter to me more than I matter to you right now and I'm not going to put up with that."
A serial monogamist who was married for six years doesn't need to figure out her shit at your expense. You can be cool with it? But you won't be happy about it. And she won't respect you.