i've had a lot of misery in my life and somewhere in the middle of it i tripped over god without realizing it: i was never raised religious and until i started interacting with the academic side of christianity i never thought about it consciously, but i started to do a lot of reading on the early church and christ as a historical figure and it helped me understand how i felt about myself and the kind of future i want to live out - this is one of a lot of articles/books in that reading

i get caught up in my head a lot and fritter away time, but there's something that makes me feel like i snapped out of a daze and focuses me and makes me aware of my thoughts

i don't want to seem silly or crazy, but i've had similar moments in the past in a non-religious context and i think i've talked about some on hubski (shoveling snow?) and i believe there's some kind of peace or centering force inside me that i reach sometimes, so maybe that's god

when i type it out it sounds pretty crazy now that i think about it, but it's the truth, and crazy or not i think it's important