Transition period.

Chopping vegetables IS meditating. Leave the 10-day retreat for after you have that high-powered corporate job and haven't taken a vacation in 5 years.

An analogy: Work two 24-hour days straight, in a suit, in high-powered business environment, powered by nothing more than coffee and cold takeout food. Super high-pressure. Stress. Aggravation. Irritation. GRRR! Then, leave the office, find a swimming pool, and jump in while still wearing your suit and heels and with your iPhone in your pocket.

BAM! That is meditation. When you have been running too fast, too far, and not eating well, and stressing out, and all that... meditation will help you find your center, and get you balanced again.

Meditation is not very useful when you are chill.

And right now, as you spend time considering your future, trying to figure out what to do next, etc, you are already inside your own head and heart, and you are very present and connected with yourself.

All meditation can do for you at that point is provide some marginal gains. Maybe chill you out a little further. Or whatever. It isn't the shaking-the-snow-globe kind of reset that a 10-day retreat is supposed to be.

Sounds to me like you are in the perfect place right now... receptors open... eyes wide... looking at the world... seeking the patterns that will vibe with who you are...

Keep it up. You are on the right track. Just remember that the right answers don't tend to be the easy ones.