Hit the nail on the head. If I stop being critical of myself I will descend into a comfortable path to suicide. I've talked about it before, the 'adequate' spouse, 'adequate' house, 'adequate' kids, 'adequate' addictions, 'adequate' insanity and an 'adequate' suicide. Xanax my way right into driving off a cliff.
RE: Wolves I don't want to just 'not let them in,' I want to chase after them with a sharpened stick and a bunch of other angry monkeys and wear their bloody pelts. I want them so dead that the next generations of monkeys talk about wolves the way we talk about dragons, or unicorns, or other mythical creatures. And I appreciate other peoples stories and perspectives, so don't apologize for sharing what you are comfortable sharing.I felt that self-loathing saved me from becoming what I was afraid of and would truly hate; what I couldn't stand to be.