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comment by elizabeth
elizabeth  ·  4004 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Hubski, what is the story of your first love?

It is good enough and I appreciate it.

But that's how every couple felt at some point. There's a point before breaking up that you realise you don't have everything you need. I'm just hoping that moment never comes. I just felt a bit silly when I started typing up my response first and I sounded a lot like my niece when she declares she will marry some guy in her class (She's in primary school FYI). She might believe it when she says it, but everyone around her just knows she's being naive and laught it off because we all know she'll realise the truth in a week.





b_b  ·  4004 days ago  ·  link  ·  

I don't have a lot of advice on how to make a relationship work, but I have a lot of advice on how to destroy them, as I'm pretty experienced in that regard. Firstly, you're never going to be excited to be around one person all the time. The problem is that doesn't meet everyone's fantasy and they jump ship. It's easier than sticking it out. That's bullshit. Are you excited to see your family all the time? Probably not, but you love them in a way that's well beyond infatuation.

Second, if your partner isn't meeting your expectations about some issue, bring it up to them. It's shitty to have to have talks like that but it cleans the wound. Otherwise, you'll end up with the relationship equivalent of a trench boil, and it will puss all over you. Been there. Not fun.

Lastly, if you really think of someone as a long term partner, think about what that means to you. Practical things aren't sexy at all (what are my career goals? do I want children? etc), but it's a lot easier to sort that shit out earlier rather than waiting a few years to find out that you aren't on the same page.

humanodon  ·  4004 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Heh, funnily enough, that happened just as I was breaking up with my girlfriend of 2 years before I moved back to the US . . .