That's a lot to absorb. I'm sorry you had to go through the pregnancy especially. I can't imagine that being anything but a nightmare. It's telling that almost every one's mistakes involve their love lives. Objectively speaking, my biggest mistake is that I quit my white collar job at DaimlerChrysler a couple months before they offered all white collar employees of my rank a $100,000 buyout option. That stung. But we can't look at our lives objectively, can we? If I were to write about my biggest mistakes, it wouldn't come close to the top of the list. Certainly my biggest mistakes are all with women whom I loved and treated poorly for one reason or another (one in particular, but I don't really feel comfortable sharing all the details). It's sad, because life should be so much easier than it is. That is why it's so easy for your friends and family to have very good prescriptive advice in these situations, but also why we can never follow good advice. Reason and logic are meaningless in love (or lust).
It was pretty awful. But it is over and I am at a better point in my life and, you know what, I know myself a lot better partially because of it. I know that when I have to make a tough decision I can and I will make the decision that I think is right for me even if I'm mostly alone. (My family wasn't aware. I think most of my friends were scandalized. Gossip is a thing that happens.) "Life is short and pain is long and we were all put here on this earth to help each other." - Stephen King, Firestarter I think eventually if I don't work at my relationship with my mother, I will consider it a mistake. But my mother is a little bit loopy and it makes things hard. And yes - so very easy to give advice - so very hard to not do what the heart wants. I only hope to learn from every misstep and, Anne of Green Gables, find new ones instead of repeats. (In jest! Ha. As long as my new mistakes are not as big as some of my old ones.)