As far as understanding racial struggle I think this is where systemic comes in. For example, the prison pipeline. Why do black people go to jail more? Profiling is one factor, but there are others. For instance, housing and education. Poverty increases the likelihood of criminal activity. A black person in the US is more likely to be poor than a white person, and that greater likelihood of poverty is a consequence of the history of white control over black people. Black people were barred from better housing by law, were segregated into lower quality schools, etc. At no point was separate but equal truly equal. Black people were denied higher paying jobs. Black people patronized white businesses, but the reverse wasn't true. When white people move into a neighborhood, it's gentrifying, whereas when POC started moving into a neighborhood after house prices drop, white folks started moving out.
A lot of the white people I knew when told any of this, took it as a guilt trip, or ask why black people don't pull themselves up by the bootstraps. Being the 'default race', they don't see themselves in terms of the actions of their race, but continue to categorize other races by the actions of people of the same race.
A non racially charged example of this knock on effect idea might be the increased prevalence of prescription drug abuse in Appalachian Virginia, which is a consequence of the history of absentee land owner landlords, lower education, and orientation around back breaking mine work which then collapsed.
I'm coming at this as a mixed race immigrant turned American expat,which is probably relevant to what I have to say about American race relations.
The point I get from 'people are dying' is that specifically police violence against black and hispanic people is being justified as statistically supported profiling, when its not clear the statistics actually bear that out.
I disagree with them segregating themselves from white people to talk about race because although the best teacher would be talking to people of other races, as someone of another race I get emotionally exhausted sometimes, having to argue about things I have a personal stake in with white people who don't believe me, don't want to believe me, and are less likely to even care what I have to say because I'm not white. It's probably easier for a white person who has tried to inform themselves about these issues to have that discussion than it is for me.
What would I like you to do about it? Educate your fellow white folks? Challenge your knee jerk reactions? Consider whether anti-white attitudes are really as prevalent as you might think and/or where they might come from? Personally, I just lost faith that America is a good place for a person like me to live and stopped believing that would change, so I suppose I have given up, same as the author.