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I really like your comments, thenewgreen! Thank you for your support and clever wit. I liked it when you said "not allocating my time in the most beneficial way". I feel that I do this often. Maybe that is where the "miscast" feeling is coming from. However sometimes I am really kind to myself and I stop and feel peace and gratitude for all that I have. My friends and family and such. It is truly a rewarding and lovely experience. Plus if all of that fails there are always cookies.