a thoughtful web.
Good ideas and conversation. No ads, no tracking.   Login or Take a Tour!
comment by caelum19
caelum19  ·  3360 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Men: Older? School-Age? College-Age?: Do You Ever Ask These Questions?

You already know but in the interest of others, I'm male and school age.

I didn't ask myself any of these questions except the last two, and the amount of thought it takes to answer them makes me think I should

    -- “Am I treating women with the same respect and consideration that I would treat a male team member?”

I can only think of one 'team' I'm part of that has a female member, but in this case and hypothetical cases I would not consider gender internally at all, unless it was relevant.

However, in hypothetical cases with women I don't know as well, I would probably show slightly more outward respect and give them more feedback as I understand this is an issue in some places and they might feel discriminated or that I give their ideas less consideration just because they're women.

    -- “Am I assuming too many leadership roles without giving others a chance?”

Generally, I do not assume leadership roles. If I'm starting a group, I will only invite people I see as equal and try to form a dynamic where we all have equal say. Though I imagine the judgement in whether or not someone is competent enough to be 'equal' in terms of leadership is similar to whether or not I should assume leadership, so I guess it boils down to "Do I judge people too soon?", which I do not ask myself. Come to think of it, there have been several people I underestimated at first I can think of. But my opinions of people aren't set in stone, they change all the time and when I realise I underestimated them I'm not going to hide it or anything, I don't see how someone could have enough fear/arrogance to do that.

    “What other assumptions am I making about the race, gender, ability, skills, intelligence of others? Is it possible that I am making assumptions without being aware of it?"

I do ask myself a more generic version of this question quite a lot as part of an effort to keep my subconcious in it's place, and it's saved me from a lot of false assumptions.

    Am I building my personal skills to be a good citizen, parent, friend, son, brother, etc.?”

Way too often.