My ex-girlfriend is from the US.
We were together for about two years after meeting each other in Barcelona. I went state side for a while and she came and lived with me in Australia for a year. She left at the end of June and we both decided that our lives were going in different directions and we needed to follow our own paths. Which really sucked. But we parted on good terms and still talk fairly regularly.
I recently met a guy who wants to take me out for a drink. I want to go. I like meeting new people. I like dating. I like being social. But is it too soon? Is there a certain period that must elapse before I can start something new? Is there a rubric for people like me who have no clue? Will I be doing the woman I loved an injustice by moving on so quickly? Will people care? Should I care if people care?
I want the answer to be no. But I have a tendency to over think things like this.
What's hubski's opinion? How soon is too soon to move on? How long is long enough? Does it vary by circumstance? Should I wait? Am I being too whiney? :P
No.
No.
No.
Probably.
No. As soon as you're ready.
Whenever you're ready.
Yes.
Do you want to?
No.Is there a certain period that must elapse before I can start something new? Is there a rubric for people like me who have no clue? Will I be doing the woman I loved an injustice by moving on so quickly? Will people care? Should I care if people care?
How soon is too soon to move on? How long is long enough? Does it vary by circumstance? Should I wait? Am I being too whiney? :P
I don't think there's a fixed period you need to wait. You certainly won't be doing your ex an injustice, especially because by moving on you're not forgetting her or burning her memory or anything. It's possible to cherish the time you had with her while looking for the next great adventure. And imagine how bad you'd feel if you knew you'd passed up on the relationship of a lifetime out of a misguided sense of honor for your ex! She's hardly spying on you to make sure you don't go on any dates for six months. The only thing that does matter is whether or not you're emotionally ready to see someone else. That's the big matzah ball. Problem is, as far as I can tell, there's no real way of knowing whether you're ready or not. The best thing to do is, if you want to go on the date (and it sounds like you do), then go enjoy yourself and see how it goes.
Do what works for you. You know yourself best! I personally don't think there is "too short" or "too long" of a time to get back out there. If you feel you are ready to start going on dates again, go for it! I had a relationship the same length as yours (2 years and change) and started dating someone else a month after we broke up; a man I was with for 4 months took me another 6 to move on from. Everyone, and every relationship, is different. Go get that drink and have fun :)