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goobster  ·  1967 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Cannibal Corpse. Cannibal Corpse is the most metal.

I really wanted to love this article, but it is almost incomprehensible.

OK. Dude was in someone else's house (a neighbor?), and pushed/knocked down the wife.

The cops come.

He brandishes a knife at the cops.

They tase him.

His house explodes in flames. (I'm visualizing this happen as he's thrashing on the floor, pissing himself from the taser.)

Instantly - or maybe later - the fire department tries to go in, but can't, due to the ammo store exploding and firing off rounds everywhere.

And he's going on tour with Slayer on their final tour.

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I'm just ... what? Who the fuck wrote this article?!? Who the fuck edited it?!? Who the fuck posted it to the web site?!? How did any other media outlet make any sense of the story, so they could link to it...?!?