Marriage is a legal agreement/contract that seeps into every area of your life. It determines taxes, rental rates, leasing, credit rating, benefits, custody rights, bank accounts, savings, wills, and so much else. Think about the stories you've heard about arranged marriages in times past : the entire point of the marriage is so that two families will become inextricably bound, the fate of nations type stuff. Not every long-term couple needs to get married. I personally am not into marriage, have never dreamed about the perfect wedding gown or planned out my fairytale wedding. Because I know that people place way too much importance on labels, and not as much on actual content. Not wanting that fairytale event doesn't mean you're a bad person. Much like diamond rings: once you learn about the awful history behind diamonds and the great mind-fuck a corporation played on the American populace, it's no longer important. It's just a thing, a ring of metal, and what's more important is figuring out what's important to you. The only reason I'd get married is for specific tax breaks, insurance reasons, if we had kids, and the like. And I'd definitely have a prenup. But if I'm with someone and they're pressuring me to get married NOT because of tax/economic reasons, but because they have a fairytale stereotype of "what people are supposed to do"... I'd run. Far away. I'd be nice about it, but I'd make it very clear we're not looking at things the same way, and end it. If she's all wrapped up in fairytale assumption and stereotype cliches, she may vilify you for refusing to acquiesce to her subjective way of thinking. No matter how considerate, rational and honest you are. Relatedly, it's kinda like how someone you're in a relationship will ask you to proclaim eternal love for them, say that you'll stay with them forever. Like it's a test, and if you don't, they say you're afraid of commitment. Here's the thing: you have no guarantee you'll be together forever. Nation might sink into war, one of you may die early on, or maybe you grow apart. I'd much rather focus on love and commitment in the now.